r/Salsa • u/HorseElectronic3477 • 9d ago

Skill level

I am convinced, and I will die on this hill, that the number, quality and frequency of strangers coming to ask you out for a dance is a strong solid indicator of how good you are at dancing.

I do not mean a random ask. I mean where strangers search for, will wait and beeline for you.

For example, the fact I rarely get asked by strangers (when they do it is a random ask) and I only dance with people I know, is a clear indication that my dance is lucking.

36 Upvotes

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93

u/Middle-Fuel-6402 9d ago

On the socials I’ve been, attractive women seem to get invited more. There’s often a girl in her 20s that’s literally never had a class in her life and men will go after her and happily and patiently teach her stuff on the dance floor. (I’m not approving of this, just sharing observations)

62

u/calanthean 9d ago

This. 1000x this. Age and looks matter more than most care to admit.

41

u/Resident_Pay4310 8d ago

Yep.

I'm on the heavier side (follower) and often have to be the one to ask.

The amount of times I've seen leaders begrudgingly accept only to realise during the dance that I'm actually very good.

I always enjoy the wide eyed look they have at the end of the dance where they then ask me my name.

21

u/No-Cry8182 8d ago

Girl SAME and it is SO frustrating. The worst is when those same guys walk right up to me and a thinner friend who has much less experience than me, ask her to dance, and pretend I’m not even there.

So satisfying when I ask them to dance later and absolutely blow their minds.

14

u/TheNewYorkRhymes 8d ago

As a guy. I always ask any woman, even in groups, who is willing, then see skill. A good additude or skill will always have my vote over pretty

-8

u/kuschelig69 8d ago

Conversely, it is also frustrating as a leader when we ask a heavy follower to dance and then get rejected

3

u/axteroide 8d ago

Literally saw this this week. Saw how a group of girls all got asked to dance except for ones little bit bigger. So I instantly went to ask her. And I'm the kind of person who struggles to ask others to dance due to social anxiety and still not being too good at dancing. But I couldn't let that girl sit there alone while all her friends were dancing...

0

u/Own_Affect_7931 8d ago

As a 6'3" white guy I get this same look from Latin women that don't know me, lol.

2

u/Resident_Pay4310 8d ago

Really? Haha.

Are they assuming white men can't dance?

1

u/Own_Affect_7931 8d ago

LOL, I think so. I'm pretty well known in my salsa scene now, so I rarely get this anymore (usually at congresses or out of towners), but it's always funny to me when I do. The grudging, skeptical acceptance, then the pleasantly shocked look, then the "...okay!" expression.

-10

u/WestHistorians 8d ago

Are you smiling? Dressed nice? I have found that heavier followers often don't dress well and that may be a factor.

11

u/Resident_Pay4310 8d ago

A+ on the assumptions there.

Also please reflect on the fact that you essential just said "if you were prettier people would dance with you more"

You proved my point that looks mater more than ability.

-5

u/WestHistorians 8d ago

Also please reflect on the fact that you essential just said "if you were prettier people would dance with you more"

I said smiling and dressed nice. I said nothing about "pretty", you brought that up, so it's you that is making assumptions here.