are people really taking the original video seriously?? i think itâs hilarious. reminds me of jokes about twinks and butch lesbians being mistaken for each other lmao. The guy in the edit looks like a really cool person. More people need to try out long hair IMO!!
there is an incredible twitter thread from a somewhat feminine gay guy who kissed a lesbian thinking she was a twink, and she thought he was a masc lesbian.
Thank you! The look of sheer disappointment on his face is absolutely priceless to the point I thought it might be from a skit, the fact that itâs real is even better
Thatâs why none of that shit even matters. If youâre attracted to someone itâs just that. Donât try to fight it or read too much into it because youâre going against human nature itself by doing so. Not saying we should give into every primal instinct but when it comes to sex our bodies usually know whatâs up.
Itâs easier to assume everybody is stupid but not you because you're special, than actually putting the effort to get other's perspective or humor. I see that a lot, and I certainly did it myself.
It's like this clip (if you're homeless just buy a house). I mean, the girl was clearly joking.
But this guy had to take it seriouly and humiliate her. I mean the song is great, and I'm glad it exists, but people...stop thinking this girl is dumb, it's clearly humour.
Also the guy in the song quotes the "300 000 homeless VETERANS". Like, maybe it's an american thing (I'm european), but why only talk about veterans? Like are normal homeless people are not worth it?
why only talk about veterans? Like are normal homeless people are not worth it?
I've had a conversation with someone before where I was discussing the amount of homelessness, and the person I was talking to discounted my numbers by saying "well, yeah, but a lot of those people aren't actually homeless. They're just, like, gay kids who got kicked out by their parents or something".
So yeah, there are definitely people who think that homelessness is a bad thing only if certain people are homeless.
why only talk about veterans? Like are normal homeless people are not worth it?
I think America's view/treatment of veterans is deeply strange but in the context, I think it works to highlight the issue. It's not that homeless regular people aren't worth it, it's more pointing out that the country can't even be bothered looking after the people that were actually willing to make ultimate sacrifices for the country.
This isn't to say regular people aren't doing things for their country, it's just easier/more obvious with veterans. They potentially risked death or disability and you can't even house them. (Or provide the mental health support that gets them back on track to wanting housing)
What's the joke? At best she's pretending to be out of touch and stupid but there's no punchline? No pun, no visual gag, nothing to indicate that its a joke of any kind
This shit does really happen though. She is making fun of a thing that really does happen.
I've seen a mile long rant by a Gold Star lesbian ranting about the time she hit on a trans man thinking he was a butch lesbian and how dare the evil trans man do that to her.
I'm not the same person that said that, but we all have yellow icons so I can see why you'd think I was.
But those are not mutually exclusive concepts.
They say it's full of misogyny, but that doesn't mean it's not full of sexism. My point is that what you said is what made it a competition. That's all.
Sexism is misogyny. This is something that everyone needs to understand. EVERYONE suffers under the patriarchy. Men being constrained by bullshit standards like having short hair and never wearing certain colors or anything too sparkly etc is because of the patriarchy. Men being told they canât have any emotions other than anger or self-satisfaction is because of the patriarchy. Women being assumed to be better parents (and by extension, men being given less expectations in parenting, and also by extension, men being praised more for the same parenting behaviors as women are expected to do) is because of the patriarchy. Men being unable to form deep friendships because they were raised never to be vulnerable is because of the patriarchy. Men being lonely and miserable and offing themselves is because of the patriarchy. The patriarchy dictates that men have to meet certain standards to be above women or else theyâre wrong and will lose social power. Any actions that men willingly take that knock themselves down a peg is seen as mock-worthy, or even dangerous. Literally look at the way trans women are treated. They are the actual boogey-man in todayâs society, along with immigrants, and itâs all because society sees them as men who are betraying manhood. Gay men, too, are threatening to the patriarchy because they dare to step out of that box that it puts men into. Sexism is just misogyny, hands down. Itâs not taking the focus away from men by saying exactly HOW men are harmed by the patriarchy, itâs actually getting into the weeds of it and solving the fucking problem, which is that men canât act like women or else theyâre fucked.
Welcome to modern slop Reddit, users moving from Facebook who think a "picture with some text under it" is some sort of primary news or information source
Being excited about meeting an attractive masc lesbian is a pretty queer experience, which makes it a queer joke. I'm glad you found a way to relate to it as a straight guy, though. My point is that queer people are allowed to make jokes about being queer, and those can accurately be called queer humor.
You are so disingenuous. The person I was responding to was mocking straight people. You can call me dumb or try to create some in-group but humor is humor, there is nothing called queer humor. If a gay person drinks coffee is it queer coffee? If thereâs a book about a gay person itâs a queer book? Do you people really need such an insular experience in life?
I didn't say all that, but I apologize if I misunderstood your initial comment or mistakenly called you stupid. For the record, "us people" don't lead insular lives because we work with non-queer people and things every single day. Most of our family, friends, coworkers, and acquaintances are cis and straight. The vast majority of people in media are cis and straight. Many things in life have little to do with our gender or sexuality. However, jokes about being queer objectively exist, and I don't think calling them queer is taking any major stance. I think we're bickering over semantics at this point, and you're free to disagree.
I've made the points I wanted to. I'm sorry if I misunderstood yours. I'm going to go have dinner now.
I'm not sure how people normally end conversations on the internet, but I hope you have a good day.
Eh, it doesn't come off as OOT if you've ever had the unfortunate experience of hanging out around TERFy lesbians. Some women love to hatekeep what they think of as womanly.
I meant to type gatekeep, but hatekeep is just so appropriate I'm leaving it.
Except the issue is that you're taking her "actions" totally out of context. The joke isn't "haha men need to stop acting this way" - the joke is that her reaction to a harmless situation is excessive and absurd.
You obviously don't need to find it funny, but if you believe that she could genuinely be sobbing because she was momentarily attracted to a guy with long hair then you're simply not very good at reading social and contextual cues. Any remotely well-adjusted person would be able to immediately tell that she is very obviously taking the piss - there's no discussion to be had about it, that's just a fact.
assuming someone who is very clearly joking is a TERF because of experiences you've had with unrelated TERFs is what I am saying is the problem. She's kidding and it doesn't matter if some other asshole is being hateful... you dont get to take her joke as face value because others have been hateful.
And, you are rebutting with something entirely different. If an individual says something racist, dimiss them. That makes sense! But if someone tells the same joke as a racist, but has otherwise not been racist, you dont declare the joke racist too.
So you think it's your job to police lesbians joking about a very common lesbian experience in a way that does not offend cis men?in defense of trans women, an entirely different group who have nothing to do with butch women and cis men and do not present on a way that would be confused otherÂ
This is the worst most homophobic advocacy ever. You're defending nobody but falling over yourself to attack lesbiansÂ
No. Youâre just a bad person who looks to defend shitty behaviour hiding behind a joke.
If a guy âjokedâ that men shouldnât have long hair because they get them confused for a woman Iâd say the same thing. Which is something Iâve seen happen and is actually very much something men have been harassed for.
Youâre just trying to hide behind jokes to push and reinforce gender norms. Which btw very much would have to do with cis men and ESPECIALLY butch women which is LITERALLY an example of pushing against gender norms.
Youâre admitting you think long hair is a feminine trait and therefore itâs okay to joke about men doing it. Then turn around and claim people who donât feel pushing gender norms should be something to joke about are attacking groups whose identity is tied to breaking those very gender normsâŚ
You think itâs okay for a guy to joke about butch women are men? I donât. But you seem to think going the other way is fine.
Whatâs funny about the original video is their over reaction, not necessarily the content of their joke. I donât think the person in the original video actually cares that much about whether men have long hair.
No it's just funny when you see someone from behind and get excited that they look just like the type of person you're into and when they turn around they are completely not. Lighten the fuck up, the people harassing you are assholes, she isn't harassing anyone she is just giving an obvious overreaction to that feeling a lot of us have had.
She isn't actually telling people what to do with their body you lunatic. Chill the fuck out.
I don't know her. I don't have any reason to think she's joking.
Plus I don't have a lot of tolerance for "I'm just being edgy" or "I'm just venting" sexist jokes. More often than not, they're not joking, just telling on themselves.
Ironic sexists and casual sexists have a fundamental problem... to people who don't know how much they don't mean the things they're sayings... they're just being sexist.
I don't know her. I don't have any reason to think she's joking.
well that gets back to my initial point, you cannot spend your whole life assuming the worst of everyone you interact with because some people are awful. you dont know her, so why assume she's bad? why not just assume she's joking? it's not even an edgy joke... its pretty tame queer humor.
How often do TERFy Lesbians actually say something is wrong with men having long hair?
This does not seem like a serious, systemic problem. Like if I walk downtown and see a teenager healing obscenities at a dumpster while drunk, I don't need to start acting like that's the normal thing teenagers are doing enough to be in occurrence that regular people would run into.
But I mean that one person that does it, yeah that sucks to navigate around. How many years ago was that though and how often has it happened since?
We measure harm by how often it occurs, and how it impacts people's lives. I just don't think that the turf lesbian long hair haters are in any way common
The easiest way to turn a blind eye is to reduce human beings to statistics.
You can powerscale sexist acts all you want. I'm sure it's a lot of fun figuring out exactly which level of sexism is OK to call out. Does it change things that I'm nonbinary? Does that give me a stat boost in your match-up? I fuckin' hope not...
I like to keep things simple when it comes to sexism. I'm just flat against it.
Creative interventions toolkit on addressing interpretational violence - look at the getting clear section. This is a toolkit made by experts and activists on violence and abuse.
They do consider whether or not a harm is something that happened in the past, that is a pattern of behavior that is ongoing, a pattern of behavior in the past, etc.
You cannot properly address harm without understanding whether or not it is a pattern or a random one-time act.
Those are professionals in specific personal circumstances. Not really applicable.
Ordinary people aren't ranking harm in order to better help each other, they're not performing triage, theyre looking for an excuse to dismiss people they don't care about so they don't feel bad.
You see it literally every time someone brings up a problem others want to ignore. "Oh, it's not a real problem, and it shouldn't bother you because it's not as bad as //fill in the blank depending on issue//."
Once, back in my first year of high school, I tried growing out my hair, hoping Iâd look like Tom Hiddelston (as Loki), but after two months, it looked like a thick tuft that creates a "helmet" effect because my hair is naturally thick. In the end, I decided to stick with the Tom Hardy haircut haha
I wanted long hair since I was a boy watching He-Man. Took until I had a job where I could wear a hat, that I got beyond the ugly stage. Eventually had some wicked wavey curls if I let my hair air dry.
One time I straightened it and it practically disappeared lol like my big thick curls are mostly air.
I think my perfect hair length is a sort of mini afro that is reminiscent of Queen Elizabeth the second lol
Over a lifetime, jokes that aren't malicious can eventually become hurtful. I wish people would think with more nuanced empathy before they make jokes.
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u/Joseph707 11d ago
are people really taking the original video seriously?? i think itâs hilarious. reminds me of jokes about twinks and butch lesbians being mistaken for each other lmao. The guy in the edit looks like a really cool person. More people need to try out long hair IMO!!