r/PolyFidelity • u/Ginger_Gerl • 12d ago

seeking advice Does Feeld actually work? NSFW

has anyone had luck with the free version of Feeld? I've been using it for a couple weeks now with zero luck. I dont want to pay for it just yet cuz I've had little success with online dating in the past. Maybe I'm impatient, or maybe this is another app that just wants your money....idk.

any advice?

we are being open and honest in our bio. maybe we arent using the right terms and such? we worry that some people might think we are looking for a "unicorn". but that's genuinely not what we are looking for.

If I've learned my terminology correctly then what I'm looking for is "a closed V, kitchen table relationship with a woman".

I (31F) want a girlfriend that is comfortable with polyfi. She doesn't need to be attracted to my man, but I'd like for them to get along so we can all hang out together.

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u/StaceOdyssey 12d ago

Can I ask why you’re proposing that they need to be okay with dating only one person and they need to be okay with you have two partners?

A lot of hinge poly relationships work out that way but I wonder if that’s why you feel the app isn’t working for you. “X for me, but not for thee” is a turn off for a lot of people on principle, regardless of what X is.

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u/hot-fudge-sundae116 12d ago

This part. Neither of us were looking for closed when we found each other. It just ended up working out that way. And it doesn’t mean we’ll be closed forever. We are very satisfied in our closed V now. My husband is asexual. And my fiancé and I are sexually exclusive with each other. But we are open to discussion for future changes. Just not right now.

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u/StaceOdyssey 12d ago

Same here. My partner is saturated at one and my spouse dates sporadically. I’m often the only hinge. If everyone’s happy with it, awesome, if it changes in the future, also cool! (I hope my spouse dates more, TBH.)

I find that descriptively closed poly tends to work better than prescriptively closed, from what I’ve seen and experienced.

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u/hot-fudge-sundae116 12d ago

Same. I wish my husband would date. But they are both maxed out at me.