r/GilmoreGirls • u/cris-imnida • 44m ago
Critical Character Discussion Team Jess Is Overrated (Sorry, Not Sorry)
I know this is probably an unpopular opinion around here, but after multiple rewatches, I still can’t get behind Team Jess.
Every time I rewatch, I’m reminded that Jess basically spent an entire season trying to wedge himself into Rory and Dean’s relationship. I know Dean and Rory had their own issues, but Jess was absolutely pursuing someone who was already in a relationship and seemed perfectly fine with creating tension between them until it finally fell apart. I always find it funny when Jess later acts jealous and possessive about Dean because… sir, that is literally how you got here.
I also think people romanticize Jess because of his intelligence, sarcasm, and eventual growth, but teenage Jess was honestly kind of awful. Yes, he had a difficult upbringing, and I feel for him. But having a rough childhood doesn’t automatically excuse treating everyone around you badly. Luke bent over backwards for him and Jess responded by being rude, ungrateful, and hostile to practically everyone who tried to help him.
Then there’s the bedroom scene at Kyle’s party, which I find genuinely disturbing every time I watch it. Rory clearly tells him to stop, and he doesn’t immediately respect that boundary. I know fans debate the scene endlessly, but it always makes me uncomfortable when people try to brush it off or blame Rory somehow. That scene alone makes it very hard for me to view their relationship as romantic.
And speaking of their relationship, Jess was just not a good boyfriend. He was unreliable, secretive, communicated terribly, disappeared without explanation, and often made Rory feel anxious rather than supported. So many people focus on the chemistry, but chemistry doesn’t automatically make a healthy relationship.
Even later, when he shows up with the whole “Why did you drop out of Yale?” speech, I’ve never viewed it as the earth-shattering moment some fans make it out to be. Jess knew Rory for a relatively short period of her life. Meanwhile, the people who had actually known her for years had been expressing concern too. I get why the scene is memorable, but I’ve always thought fans give Jess way too much credit for it.
I do think adult Jess becomes a much better person than teenage Jess, and I genuinely like his character growth. But liking his growth as a character and thinking he was a good boyfriend for Rory are two completely different things.
So yeah, after every rewatch, I end up in exactly the same place: I like Jess as a character, but I’ll never understand why so many people act like Rory and Jess were some great love story.