r/weightlossafterbaby • u/Wise-Principle0 • Jan 27 '26
How did you cope with constant fear during pregnancy after a loss?
An honest question for those who had a miscarriage and then got pregnant again: Did your second pregnancy bring more anxiety than happiness? That’s how I feel. My previous miscarriage never really felt “closed” emotionally, and now everything is back. The absence of symptoms scares me. Every small thing feels like a threat. I find myself constantly monitoring and overthinking. The joy? Almost gone. Getting attached feels hard. And on top of that, there’s guilt for not feeling the way I think I’m supposed to. If you’re comfortable sharing, how did you get through this phase? Or is it something that’s still with you?
3
u/Sushi9999 Jan 27 '26
I described getting through my first successful pregnancy as “white knuckling through it” but as we got closer and closer to his due date I did eventually start feeling better. It’s a perfectly understandable feeling to be scared because we know what it is to feel that loss and that setback to having a living child. My general strategy was to do everything right, by which I mean kick counts, healthy living etc, and then I had to have radical acceptance that everything was ok until I got to the next milestone or learned otherwise.
2
u/Legalkangaroo Jan 29 '26
You won’t relax until that baby is out. Please get some therapy so you can feel less anxious. I found looking at the risk calculator dropping week by week a really helpful technique for me (but I am very pragmatic). Best of luck.
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u/nyokarose Jan 28 '26
I lost 3 in a row, including one second trimester. At some point I just had to accept that spending time worrying about losing baby wasn’t going to make it less likely to happen but it was making me lose entire years of my life being miserable and anxious. I can’t get that time back. I spent a lot of time keeping my mind busy elsewhere, but I also worked with a therapist and determinedly worked to let the thoughts go.