r/sleeptrain • u/Fun-Information78 • May 02 '26
Success Story 4 month sleep regression is making me question every life choice I've ever made
My baby used to sleep in 5 hour chunks. Now she wakes up every 45 minutes like she's being paid to ruin my sanity. We tried fuss it out, check and console, even just staring at her until she falls asleep from sheer confusion. Nothing works. I'm currently running on two hours of broken sleep and a cold brew that stopped working three cups ago. Please tell me this ends. Also if your baby slept through the night at 4 months please keep that information to yourself right now. I am fragile.
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u/jaxacnh May 02 '26
Could be a schedule issue? If you are good with fuss it out I would just strongly commit to doing Ferber or some sleep training method. You need to actually commit to it. Schedule needs to be strong to. More baby is awake the longer the will sleep
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May 02 '26
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u/jaxacnh May 02 '26
Ok I said could be? Yes their sleep changes at 4 months of course. It’s nice to see the whole picture. I’m only trying to offer support in the way I know how.
Not sure what I have done to offend you personally. No real reason to respond to me with any snark.
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u/sleeptrain-ModTeam May 02 '26
Post/comment removed at moderators discretion. This is to ensure a judgement free environment that is supportive to everyone interested in the spectrum of independent sleep.
-misc toxicity, negativity, judgmental language, etc deemed unproductive by the mods
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u/wrinklywrink May 03 '26
My baby was the same, except at 4 months he only slept in 30 min increments. It went on like this for a month until our pediatrician finally told us this was not healthy for any of us and we needed to sleep train. Did gentle Ferber and within a few days he started connecting cycles. Despite me reading that it wasn’t kosher to put your baby in their own room prior to 6 months, that really was the icing on the cake for helping him sleep through the night. He’s been a champ since then. A friend of mine had this same issue and only waited a week into the 4 month sleep regression before she sleep trained. I was so concerned because I thought they’re too young at that point, but it seems like to each their own. Both of our babies are very happy and healthy!
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u/Julesypooooo May 03 '26
4 month old regression was so hard - I had to cosleep and nurse to sleep for each wake to preserve my sanity. She grew out of it around 5 months but now we’re in the 7 month regression… it’s never ending 🫠
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u/lovely_days2345 13d ago
THERES A 7 MONTH REGRESSION 💔💔
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u/Julesypooooo 11d ago
I feel like there’s one every month 🥲 we had to drop to a two nap schedule and that seems to have helped!!
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u/Zestyclose-Street-14 May 03 '26
Our baby did the exact same. Slept for 8 hour block at night then the exact day he hit 16 weeks he was waking up every 45 minutes. Honestly it lasted no more than 9 days then his blocks of sleep starting stretching out again pretty quick, an hour more each night etc. I was freaking out thinking it would never end at the time. Hopefully it’s just a phase for you too.
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u/adh317 May 02 '26
My first never really went through the 4 month sleep regression but this baby…. Oh. My. Goodness.
Baby is 4.5 months but starting around 3 months stopped sleeping in the glorious 5-6 hour stretches. Like he’s been waking anywhere from 4-10 times a night and required me to soothe him. I was/am losing my mind as someone who requires a decent amount of sleep myself to be functional lol.
We just started sleep training with Ferber last night and it went better than expected. We sleep trained my first too, and while it was one of the hardest things, I have never ever regretted it. So as much as I was dreading sleep training my second, I’m in it right now, and very much looking forward to the results in a week or two.
As another commenter said, if you’re ok with fuss it out, I would try Ferber so you both can get some better sleep!
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u/Leftthetrash May 02 '26
My baby was never a good sleeper and would wake up every 2 hours. Thought I dodged the sleep regression but nope. The sleep regression happened right after we came back from a trip and he’d be waking up hourly. He was wide awake and would just be holding his little toes if he wasn’t hungry. I had to pull out the yoga ball to bounce my baby back to sleep. Cosleeping didn’t help. I got hit like a truck by the lack of sleep and I eventually had to get an IV while my husband called into work to take care of the baby and I.
Started the Ferber Method two days ago since my baby will be 5 months old in a few days. I was so desperate that I didn’t want to wait. It was like night and day. He still wakes up at night to feed but it’s not hourly any more. Hang in there, it’ll get better.
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u/shavasanaaa May 02 '26
Are you me? Going through exactly the same thing. Godspeed. We’ll get through this… I hope…
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u/doxie_12 May 02 '26
Worst regression we had (12m old now). Got better without doing something different, just needed time.
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u/naterbox11 May 03 '26
My 3 month old has never even given me 4 hours and is up hourly after his first 2-3hr stretch. Bless. Hold on it’ll get better. Maybe do whatever you can aka feed to sleep for a week or two and try sleep training another time?
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u/Traditional_Year_19 May 03 '26
You're fragile so Id like to tread lightly but I'm just going to spit it out. It didn't end for us. We sleep trained at 10 months because my son still woke constantly.
We didn't make a grand effort to stop it though. I coslept because I don't do well with little sleep haha.
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u/One_Cap_9210 May 05 '26
We are on 4 month regression and our baby learning to roll. So not only does he wake at 4am wide awake, take crap naps, and random night wakings.
He also rolls at night gets stuck and cries.
So what was 5-8 hour chunks is now 45 min- 3 hour chunks. It's a rough time lol
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u/Agreeable_Switch677 May 02 '26
My LO used to sleep 5 sometimes 6 hour chunks from 6w to 3 months then the regression hit but as he was too young to sleep train, I stopped nursing to sleep and putting down drowsy and settling him to sleep in his bassinet in preparation to sleep training ( I have seen some improvement but definitely need to sleep train).
It sounds like you and your LO will benefit from sleep training, there is loads of gentle sleep methods out there, like the 333 method or a more structured approach like Ferber/ modified Ferber
https://www.reddit.com/r/sleeptrain/s/sxYNThNhYL
Okay here is the mod post about a night feeding schedule:
https://www.reddit.com/r/sleeptrain/s/xYPrMrEHry
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u/Beneficial_Most_6031 May 02 '26
Sooooo, my 4 month regression started the weeek after he turned 4 months and lasted until 7 months when I bit the bullet and sleep trained. We did chair method at 5 months which helped bring back 3 hour stretches but we travelled in the middle and then ruined it again. At 7-8 months I did it properly. Try the chair method! If you’re uncomfortable with cry it out
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u/Agreeable_Switch677 May 02 '26
I’m desperate to sleep train and my LO started his 4m sleep regression at 3m, it’s been over 4 weeks of hell but I’m going to visit family in another country in 2 weeks to don’t want to start it, then ruin it so thought it best to properly give it a go after and he’ll be nearly 5m - this has validated my decision!
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u/Beneficial_Most_6031 May 02 '26
I was very anti sleep training but ultimately 3 months of 30-1 hour wake ups killed me. I did it the gentlest way I could. I still feel some guilt but I swear it changed my life.
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u/Agreeable_Switch677 May 02 '26
I literally feel the same! I thought I would never sleep train but the 1 hour wakes is killing me.
I did start putting down drowsy and keeping my hand on his chest til he falls asleep and he’s taken to that pretty well and it has extending his first stretch to 3h, sometimes 4 but the rest of the night is a nightmare!
I just feel so nervous and guilty everytime I think of doing it but it’ll be the best for the both of us as I can just see he’s tired from not getting quality sleep
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u/Beneficial_Most_6031 May 02 '26
That’s sooo great that you started that! That’s what I did too and it made the transition to the chair method so much easier/ start doing this for the rest of his wakes too and hopefully he’ll start naturally getting better and sleep training will be easier. I do think my baby took to it well because we did a gradual approach first.
Don’t feel guilty. You need sleep. It’s funny publicly I still can’t even talk about it but at the end of the day I know it was genuinely the right decision. Your baby will sleep better and so will you
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u/Agreeable_Switch677 May 02 '26
He’s in a next2me by my bed and when he wakes I do put my hand on his chest to try and settle him but he just escalates, if I pick him up to settle, and put him down drowsy he normally settles himself again and falls to sleep but he just struggles to link sleep cycles the more the night progresses.
Thanks for those kind words as I just feel so nervous to try but I know it’s what’s best for the both of us!
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u/frankenstern May 02 '26
It only ended for us after we broke sleep association (rocking and paci), adjusted schedule for more day awake time, and moved baby to her own room (less stimulation).
Does your baby have any sleep associations? How much awake time does she get daily?
Highly recommend posting your schedule here for advice, might be a game changer for you also.
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u/Agreeable_Switch677 May 02 '26
How did you break the sleep association? Through sleep training?
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u/frankenstern May 02 '26
Yes we did a modified Ferber/fuss it out combo of our own devising. The biggest thing was fixing schedule though; sleep training is a lot less painful when the baby is properly tired and ready to sleep.
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u/bananapancaker974 19d ago
My son has terrible reflux. In no world am I able to put him in his crib awake ish. He has to be held upright for at least an hour or he spits up everywhere. Any suggestions ?! I know this sleep association is what’s killing us, but I don’t know how to avoid it
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u/Smart-Fruit-202 May 02 '26
If I could go back to the 4 month sleep regression , I would do this:
Make sure your baby is taking full, intentional feeds during the day - we were snacking. It’s hard with nursing but I pumped so always knew how much she was having.
Put them down awake but close to nap time, they need to learn to self soothe. I started this at 5 weeks so she knew how and she took well to it which was probably luck.
Make sure the method you’re using to put them to sleep is sustainable. Which is why self soothing is important. Make sure they know their sleep space. Naps should mirror night sleep. Mine has always slept in her crib and I would say it’s best to teach them to be able to sleep independently. The less sleep crutches they have the better.
During the regression they wake up because they’re shifting to adult sleep cycles - we all wake up in the night but we are able to get back to sleep on our own and babies need to learn to do this too.
Look up Helping Babies Sleep on YouTube, she’s great.
During the regression mine went from Never needing to eat at night to taking 3 bottles - it was brutal. She would go back to sleep after for 2-3 hour chunks but it was still brutal (and I know you’re saying 45 mins so more power to you) - it was only until I committed to responding differently and seeing if it was real hunger and making feeds more intentional during the day that I brought down the feeds to 1 and now at 7 months we are at none!
It does get better!
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u/Sweetpup_ May 03 '26
I hear you. I feel you. This was/is us, LO used to be the perfect sleeper until he hit 4.5 months. We were travelling at the time and I think the change in environment made it even worse. He is 5.5 months now, and I hate to say but it’s still going.
I had no choice but to switch to co sleeping out of desperation, we now get 2/3 hour chunks instead of 45 minutes but I am working on gentle sleep training (though over a week and failing).
He goes in his cot at the start of the night, sometimes we get two hours sometimes it’s 30 mins. Wakes up absolutely screaming bloody murder. I’m gonna keep out it and hope that one night he will just magically sleep through.
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u/MusicalMami May 03 '26
Baby went from 8 hours in the snoo to waking up like 9 times in one night 😭😭😭😭
It’s been two weeks of this
So she’s now in her crib
She’s been screaming the past hour on and off and I’m gonna lose my shit
All to say… they say it passes and it better lol but solidarity
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u/alounely May 03 '26
Our baby also gave us glorious 4 to sometimes even 7 hour stretches before the 4 month sleep regression (and excessive rolling) hit shortly before month 4. it was rough for about 2-3 weeks (baby woke at least every two hours, sometimes every hour or less which was bad enough, but then also just wouldn’t fall back asleep for over an hour in the middle of the night) but she’s 5 months and a week now and even though it’s not as it was before it’s been getting a lot better again for some time now; yesterday she even did 4hrs and then 5hrs. We didn’t sleep train or anything, just paid attention to wake windows. I know it’s so hard when you’re in the thick of it and don’t see an end near, but it’ll pass soon, I‘m sure! 💖
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u/Zealousideal-Fun6074 29d ago
I hate to say that it has not ended for us as of yet. Started 11 weeks when she learned to roll, she is 6 months 1 week now and no end in sight. All I have for you is solidarity
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u/WeezyByfeezy May 02 '26
It won't last forever. I've been there and I literally nearly lost my mind. Call upon your partner/tribe for help with everything
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u/mrbigbucksandmuscles May 02 '26 edited May 02 '26
We had a similar experience. Baby went from 5 hours independent sleep in his crib to about 30 minutes. The regression didn’t go away on its own, but when we finally did sleep training using Ferber 3 months later, he immediately went to sleeping 5+ hours overnight. Highly recommend to try that when your pediatrician says he’s ready, we shouldn’t have waited as long as we did
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u/Legitimate_Rise6892 May 03 '26
It’s sooo hard but it passes and gets so much better! Hang in there
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u/MrB7012 May 03 '26
Going through the 4mo regression right now with twins - it’s horrifying. We’ve been at it for 6 weeks so far, but we’re not doing sleep training (my wife is passionately against it), so just suffering through 💀
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u/Effective-Donkey-729 26d ago
I feel you here! My twins have been going through it for the last six weeks also and I am hoping it ends soon. Co sleeping with one because he wakes every 30 minutes after being put down and falling asleep independently. My brain is fried from lack of sleep.
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u/Newgirlmom25 May 03 '26
For us it was her connecting sleep cycles so to save our self’s she spent the first half of the night in bassinet the rest we did save sleep 7 and co slept for about three weeks then we made sure she was eating more then enough (EBF so I pumped) and put her in her own room so she couldn’t smell me as she was waking to comfort feed. She is not a little over 5 months, this started at 3.5 months for us, and she is waking about 3 times a night.
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u/EquivalentEfficient 29d ago
Currently going through it. I just spent the last two hours trying to get my very tired baby to sleep. He was too wired and couldn’t shut his nervous system off. My son as a newborn slept every 4 hours with an 1hr wake window and then at night only woke twice briefly for a feed. Oh how glorious those times were. Now, naps last anywhere from 30 minutes to 2 hours and his wake window is 2-2.5hrs. These naps though are completely normal. Sucks for us but there’s nothing we can really do about it. I did just start him with swimming classes and he slept for 2 hours after his lesson. During the night, it’s hit or miss. Sometimes he might wake twice on a good night. Other nights it’s several times and his legs, arms and head is constantly moving. He’s learnt to roll so he’s always wanting to roll and it drives me nuts because he wakes and then hasnt learnt that he can sleep on his tummy. His startle reflex wakes him a lot. We co sleep but I’m really considering putting him in the cot. But it’s so much easier to get him back to sleep with boob. 4am mornings are good fun too 😀 Soooo I’m right there with you. When will it enddddddddd haha
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u/Least_Tea5647 29d ago
Anyone have worse experiences during the day? Nanny is taking care of baby as I just went back to work last week. I WFH and I hear baby screaming most of the day- I feel so bad for nanny and even more so for baby. Baby is only 3.5 months adjusted so I’m anticipating it getting hard for the true “4 month regression”.
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u/hi_nicole 19d ago
My baby currently has been screaming throughout the day too 🥲 She used to nap well during the day, she would go on the boob and contact nap for about one to two hours. And now she’s just fussy and screaming in my ear all day and hardly wants to take a nap, I’m considering earplugs lol. The only thing that’s worked to get her to take longer naps is going out for a car ride. Tonight she started waking up twice so far, she used to just wake up once. Hoping her night sleep doesn’t get even worse too. She just turned 4 months today.
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u/Extra-Hair-3581 28d ago
It ended for us after about 2 weeks, but then she learned to roll and started waking up because she didn’t know how to get back lol. We had like 3 nights of decent sleep. She now likes to sleep on her tummy so she’ll give longer stretches but then wake up because she wants to move to her back and can’t lol. It’s been about 3 weeks total I’d say, she just turned 5 months this weekend
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u/Late_Ad_8910 26d ago
I used to put s pillow behind my sons back to make him believe I was still behind him
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u/bananapancaker974 19d ago
Currently in the same hell as you and we are going on one month with no end in sight. (Son is 5 months old) Last nights fun was he only slept when held. Not only am I delirious, but I am now also crippled. Prayers up.
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u/awkwardlyclumsy 13d ago
4month sleep regression habits stuck and my baby and I are still not sleeping well 2 months later. Wannabe sleep deprived friends?
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u/Big_Preference1477 11d ago
We were absolutely losing our minds (I do not say that lightly, I am dead serious) so we sleep trained. CIO extinction but kept 2 night feeds if he woke for them. Then added a dream feed and now he just does one night feed. And now I have my sanity back! Highly HIGHLY recommend.
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u/jmobo26 May 02 '26
Hi, just here to say "this ends."
The 4 month regression is particularly brutal. I too was questioning everything. Like everything, it's temporary. I won't (and don't feel qualified to) address the sleep training / interventions standpoint, but FWIW with no intervention on our part but just enduring through it, our son soon settled out into sleeping longer stretches again. So I'd just like to offer that note of hope. I know how soul sucking the feeling is (I should be a voting chairperson on the boards of the company who brews STOK cold brew at this point). Things do get better Hang in there.
Signed, Parent of a 7 month old apparently about a month away from finding out what the 8-9mo regression feels like :')
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u/cyclemam 1y | DIY gentle | completish May 02 '26
The four month one is the worst one! Ok the 12 month one was a little gnarly but you've got this.
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u/Traditional_Bus_6993 May 02 '26
Great to read this. I also never thought I’d be looking into sleep training but the exhaustion is here, it’s been almost 4 weeks now. How did you help your baby getting back to sleep during the regression? We’ve tried touching his chest, pacifier, waiting for him to self-soothe (little success ofc) and the boob, which is the easiest but most tiring for me… And I read that reinforcing the association nursing-sleep is not recommended if I want to stop doing that in a near future. A « specialist » told me to wait for the end of regression to replace breastfeeding by formula at night.
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u/Silly_Assignment_398 May 02 '26
How long did it take for your baby to return to longer stretches? My baby started what seems like a sleep regression around 3 months and has got way worse at 3.5 months. I know he’s too young to train so I am just riding it out. But curious how long it took your baby.
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u/Strong_Ad4813 May 03 '26
We did Ferber sleep training at 4 months. You can definitely try it some babies are ready if your comfortable. We also aim for 14.5 hours of sleep (we use the huckleberry monthly articles on baby sleep as a guide). I did 14 hours with my daughter and got her into an overtired cycle at 4 months which caused wake ups and early morning wakes after sleep training. Allowing her to catch up on sleep helped that. 4 months they are usually going through a nap transition also. My son now just dropped to 3 naps he is nearly 5 months out schedule was 1.75/2/2/2/1.5 the last nap being a 15 min micro nap. Schedule is now 2/2.25/2.5/2.5-2.75. 15 min micro naps are life changing when doing nap transitions prevents bedtime from being pushed back which can also cause over tiredness. I would be careful adding lots of awake time if they are up all night. They probably need to catch up on sleep. It all depends on your babies sleep needs. You can definitely track their total sleep in 24 hours that helps me make a schedule for my kids
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May 03 '26
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u/bananaindisguise0 1d ago
Trying to find tips to survive this regression.. staring at her until she falls asleep from confusion has me CRACKING UP.
it’s only 11:50pm and he’s been awake many times. 😭😭 he used to sleep 9-10 hours every night.. why did I not savour every second of that? LOL
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u/PoliticoRat 12m | 333 method @ 5.5m | sleep trained May 02 '26
Hi there! I’ve been in your shoes. Here is what worked for me:
https://www.reddit.com/r/sleeptrain/s/Zm2zlo8bYA
Be sure to have baby on an age appropriate schedule! Starting schedule for 4 months is 2/2/2/2/2, where the slashes are naps. And be sure to have no more than 3.5 hours of daytime sleep across all naps!