Setting up a good bedtime routine

[u/Comprehensive_Bill]

A bedtime routine is a set of steps that happens every time and give your baby cues that it is time to sleep.

Length

A solid bedtime routine usually lasts 30-45 minutes.

What to do in this time

Common activities are bath, change nappy, massage/putting on Pjs, reading a book, tell a story, sing a few songs, hold your baby while dancing calmly but not as calm as to make them drowsy, saying goodnight to things in the bedroom.

What not to do in this time

1. Feeding. Feeding your baby less than 30 minutes before bedtime can make your baby associate the cue of feeding with sleep. In addition, in a lot of babies it makes them drowsy, which then sabotages the progress with independent sleep. My recommendation is that feeding is the last thing you do before dimm lights time comes in. Do it in the living room, then move to bathroom/sleep space for the routine.
2. Anything that can make your baby drowsy: rocking on a chair, bouncing on a yoga ball are usually not great activities as your baby can end up being drowsy and this can be counter productive to independent sleep.

How to end the routine

End the routine saying a phrase "It is time to sleep little bean, I love you" and place your baby awake (not drowsy) in their bed.

Nap time vs bedtime

The bedtime routine before naps does not have to be this lengthy. In fact you should probably only have a 5-10 minutes routine before nap. It can consist of taking the baby to their room, close the curtains, change their nappy, singing a song, and place them in bed to sleep.

[u/Full-Egg3734]

Hi, I have a 7 month old (6 months adjusted) and we usually feed half way in to the routine with a read and song afterwards and she's usually calm and not sleepy, often crying at the end of the song before being put down. Is the sleep still affecting things? Regular night wakings and struggling with pick up put down at the moment to get her to sleep independently. She does quite well with the first settle but the second (after 1.5hrs sleep) had no success and gave up after 50mins. She'd be v asleep on my shoulder but would not go in the cot..

[u/Comprehensive_Bill → u/Full-Egg3734]

Yes the feed could be affecting it. But also the method you are using could be causing issues. It could also be schedule.

PUPD is very stimulating for babies at this age and unless you're already putting her down and not picking her up at the start of the night then the night wakings are going to continue.

I don't understand what do you mean that she's very asleep on your shoulder. No sleep training method consists in transferring a baby asleep. They must fall asleep on their bed.

[u/Full-Egg3734 → u/Comprehensive_Bill]

Thanks for the response. Sorry what I meant is that she's very calm on my shoulder. She'll be crying in her cot but calms instantly on my shoulder and would fall asleep easily if I left her there. Had been holding her once calm for about 30 seconds then putting her down

[u/Comprehensive_Bill → u/Full-Egg3734]

What's your schedule? I don't think your method and your schedule are helping you accomplish your goals of independent sleep.

[u/Full-Egg3734 → u/Comprehensive_Bill]

On a 3 nap schedule at the moment. Woke up at 7. Wake windows of 2/2.5/2.5/2.75. naps were 1.5hrs, 1.25hrs, 30mins. Bed routine was nappy change, into sleep sack, feed, read, songs, cuddle, cot

[u/Comprehensive_Bill → u/Full-Egg3734]

Your schedule is not age appropriate so no sleep training method will work. This is a schedule for a 4-5mo transitioning from 4 to 3 naps.

You need a schedule with at least 10-11 hours awake in 3 or 2 naps.

[u/Full-Egg3734 → u/Comprehensive_Bill]

Ah ok. Thanks. So extend the wake windows and cut naps down to maybe 1hr,1hr,0.5hr?

[u/Comprehensive_Bill → u/Full-Egg3734]

Yes 2.5 hours sounds like a good start.

[u/Full-Egg3734 → u/Comprehensive_Bill]

Thanks!