Still alive is about all I can say. Last weekend was nice and I saw my shrink and was getting some breathing room to try and get my life to be mine again... then it all came crashing down and is worse than before. I'm doing my best but my best isn't good enough, especially when other people don't actually do what they say they will.
I'm worse. Up to 600 trileptal and eating my feelings a lot, not sure if it's a hunger from meds thing or just a me thing.
My migraines are less of an issue since someone gave me a bottle of imitrex, that I shouldn't actually take because of the lexapro, but I can't live with the migraines and being a full time caretaker. I want to go back to work but it's not an option rn. And nothing I do is any good. And nobody around me gives even half a shit.
Sounds like you have a ton on your plate. I'm really sorry things are crashing around you. If it helps, I care at least a little bit. Also high five I'm depressive subtype too! There aren't too many of us around this forum that are depressive subtype. So I get it when you say you are feeling really down. I've been there to the moon and back again, if that makes any sense whatsoever.
not sure if it's a hunger from meds thing or just a me thing.
It's a med thing. Guaranteed. Abilify, Risperdone, Saphris and so forth all are drugs that make you gain weight because, they make you so much more hungry than the normal person. It also doesn't help that you're upset because we eat more when we are depressed too. So, most people with Schizoaffective tend to be overweight. I'm in group therapy right now and 2 others have Schizoaffective and weight is a constant struggle for them (and me) the only reason, I'm LOSING weight is because of my medical condition.
If you're dealing with migraines you might want to talk to your doctor about Topamax, I've heard it helps with pain from migraines and it has an appetite suppressant to it too. That could help with your hunger issues. Unfortunately Topamax is nicknamed Dopeamax because, it can cause word recall issues. However, this does not happen in everyone. It did happen to me but only after 3months of taking it... so I went off it. But, those three months of less pain, less hunger, and more functionality was just what I needed to pull my life more together.
I also wouldn't recommend taking things that aren't prescribed by your doctor especially if there is an interaction component. You do not want to get into a worse situation medically, that could've been prevented.
By which I mean I'm sorry you also have this, it's horrible. :(
Sorry for the slow reply, it feels like the situation is getting worse and worse. I haven't been online much.
I saw my shrink this morning and discussed the imitrex, he said it is a last resort but we're at it. Fioricet is more problematic to him. I've been on both topamax and depakote and reacted poorly to both. Really we just have to switch my antidepressant because it's not really working anymore and then I could take a wider range of migraine meds, but now is not the time.
Weight has been a constant issue with meds, for sure. I ballooned to near double my weight over the course of three years, and managed to lose 60 lbs over the last four... I've gained 15 back the past two months with this stressplosion, because my willpower is shot when I'm this depressed. My clothes don't fit.
I know I'm upsetting my doctor and friends (if not outright alienating them) by staying in this toxic situation... I'm headed for a relapse. But there's no choice.
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u/koutavi depressive subtype Aug 02 '14
Still alive is about all I can say. Last weekend was nice and I saw my shrink and was getting some breathing room to try and get my life to be mine again... then it all came crashing down and is worse than before. I'm doing my best but my best isn't good enough, especially when other people don't actually do what they say they will.
I'm worse. Up to 600 trileptal and eating my feelings a lot, not sure if it's a hunger from meds thing or just a me thing.
My migraines are less of an issue since someone gave me a bottle of imitrex, that I shouldn't actually take because of the lexapro, but I can't live with the migraines and being a full time caretaker. I want to go back to work but it's not an option rn. And nothing I do is any good. And nobody around me gives even half a shit.