r/parentsofmultiples • u/gaensebluemchen22 • 6d ago

advice needed First time twin moms

I‘m wondering if anyone that had twins (or more) as their first children has any advice to give on this/feels similar. I love my b/g twins to death (they’re 5 months) but I‘m also somewhat bitter and think about missing out on the singleton experience a lot.
If you have 1 child and then multiples I think thats the jackpot for real. But even if I go on to have a 3rd child, I still will never be able to have that experience of having ONE child you can give all your attention and your doting to. And live that stereotypical newborn bubble you see all over. And just live that first time mom dream life in a way that mom of multiples cant.

I‘m just sad about missing out on what’s essentially a dream I had in regards to future parenthood. And now I‘m here in chaos and survival mode.

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u/Bachbachbach12 6d ago

Struggled with this a lot when they were babies!!! The constant feeling of being split in two directions and wondering if each got enough of you every day led to a lot of guilt and mourning of the experience I was watching my friends have.

BUT now they’re 2.5 and I’m so so happy to have twins and that feeling of mourning singleton life has gone away. They play together and entertain each other and are such buddies. I can’t imagine not experiencing this and having to entertain one toddler in my own vs having two to entertain each other often.