My cousin wanted to adopt and all my aunts (who look exactly like these women) were so against it. "It's not the same" "they come with problems" "they will take away from your own children"
Do they think "adoption" means a baby found on a doorstep? You can very often get medical history for adoptees from the biological parents, and if it's so important, can specifically adopt from biological parents who are happy to disclose that information and keep in touch with future medical information. In my state, you can even do so anonymously, with anonymous medical disclosure.
I think that "passed on" is the idea that some character traits are biological inherited. The idea that kids are not mostly creatures of upbringing, but mostly of heritage, is still strong with many people, especially if they want to consider that many people are from birth on inferior and don't deserve help.
I’m not defending those people at all but the parents could have absolutely passed on things like adhd, ocd. Mom could have drank or done drugs while pregnant with the baby. If the child is older out of infancy, there could have been abuse or trauma at home, neglect etc.
As someone with both ADHD and OCD...so could they, so what's the difference?
I mean, I know exactly what the difference is--it's that they don't see the adopted kids as "their" kids in the same way as biological kids, even if they've raised them from birth. Which is messed up, but at least we know they aren't inflicting that directly on actual adopted kids.
True, but bio-kids aren't immune from that either. Think of all the loving and careful parents who find out 30 years later that their little Jimmy was molested at church or soccer camp...
I’m adopted and I’m like a mash of my parents and other influences. I smile and laugh loud like my adopted mom in a particular way that I could have only picked up from being around her. My dad and I smoke cigars (I’m a girl and he likes to say “how many fathers can smoke cigars with their daughters?” Very proud) together and I have some of this personality traits as well.
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u/Not_l0st Jan 27 '22
My cousin wanted to adopt and all my aunts (who look exactly like these women) were so against it. "It's not the same" "they come with problems" "they will take away from your own children"
These women would never consider adoption.