I understand where people are coming from when they say this but I'm not quite sure how to feel about it. What do you guys think?

hello! my therapist has been referring me to cult deprogramming books and resources for the abuse i went through. she has said that i was brainwashed, and i feel this fits what i went through with my abuser.

i haven't posted here before but i've lurked for a bit. i understand that this community is for cult survivors in particular, and don't want to intrude if i wouldn't fit here. i am struggling to find people who understand how deep brainwashing really goes, and have yet to find solidarity in the abuse survivor communities as my abuse was not quite like that. it overtook, rewrote/wrote and destroyed my identity to replace it with the identity that my abuser wanted.

what struck me most when reading through books and resources on cults and programming/brainwashing was the responses of the survivors/victims and how much of it explained my struggles. one book wrote about the "delusion" that the abuser could come and kill the victim whenever they wanted, as if the victim is in danger 24/7. this is something that none of my friends fully understand - why i'm so terrified of doing or saying anything regarding my truth, because i believe he could come kill me for it.

i don't want to get into many details about how i was brainwashed and the abuse i did suffer in the post, but i'm wondering if anyone here has any good resources on how to undo this type of thing. how do you go about deconstructing the worldview and the role you were given? how do you tear down this godlike image of the person who brainwashed you?

These have been in the social media cycle for a little while now and it’s been bothering me quite a lot. I have no history with Scientology, and I absolutely do not support them. I see a lot of people claiming that this will help members or help “expose” the cult and… no. It won’t. It is reinforcing the us vs them thinking every high control group has. This is not how you expose things like this or reach out to internal members. It irritates me to no end because no one seems to understand this??? Like hello?? I was wondering if anyone else here thought the same or had other ideas about this situation :/

As a viewer of Jason Shurka’s channel since he was only at like 100k subs, I wanna speak honestly abt why his content feels deeply manipulative to me now.

He didn’t just share opinions. He framed himself like he was specially chosen to reveal hidden truth, teach people “the way,” and expose corruption that supposedly almost nobody else could see. At first I thought it was deep, but over time it started feelign mad off to me. What once seemed eye-opening started feeling cult-like.

Seeing reports that judges ordered him to pay over $54,000 in legal fees is what finally made me stop brushing off my concerns and actually say this out loud. feel free to look it up yourselves one search in google about judges orders jason and articles will pop up, there’s lots of stuff abt it online rn.

I rlly thought he wasn’t like those fake influencers and was actually genuine, but nope now it feels more like grandiose self-presentation, claims of unique access to truth, and messaging that pushes followers to see him as more credible than everybody else. The whole thing feels extremely fishy to me now.

Anybody else here who followed his content feel pressured, misled, or psychologically affected by it too? Cuz I can’t be the only one who felt something wasn’t right.

If you’re there Consider what is said, If not Research for before making that type of life change!

I am feeling really depressed, and have no one to talk to. I'm sort of stuck in no man's land between being a cult survivor and survivor of narcissistic abuse. I sometimes attend an online cult survivor's support group, who have been very supportive in helping me understand that my experience was a cult, even if it wasn't an organized one. (Two families: mine and my mom's sister's, living back to back, no boundaries between the household, all 4 kids had 4 parents, all 4 parents had 4 kids, essentially, was raised as though my highly abusive cousins were siblings, out of 8 people, including myself, there were 5 malignant narcs, 3 overt, 1 covert, and one a mixture of both -- the golden child, I was the scapegoat for it all.)

I started listening to cult survivors and realized there is a lot I have in common with them over and above the issues of someone who grew up with a single narc in a traditional nuclear family. We share some issues, of course, but not everyone knows what it's like to be brainwashed by almost everybody in your orbit, to be shunned by your entire family when you try to acknowledge the abuse, or to know what it's like to be up against someone (a leader, so to speak) who is so charismatic they can do or say anything about you and will be believed.

Now, today, I have just my husband and my cats as family (and even my cats don't really want to cuddle at all.) My mom died in 2020. My NB is an attorney and has all of my inheritance. It's a long ugly story I won't go into now. But I'm sitting here decorating for Christmas and trying to Christmas shop, and I realize that as difficult as my mom was (she was the covert narc), she and I used to help each other decide on Christmas gifts and such and now I have no one to even bounce off a "do you like this color or that color for him."

Of course, it goes deeper than that since I was raised to question every decision I ever thought in my head because, clearly, I was so "stupid and worthless" that I wasn't capable of making my own decisions, only my 'family' knew what was best for me, and I was brainwashed into feeling that I couldn't make a decision without relying on and/or checking with them. You feel me?

Now I sit here, alone, no matter how much therapy I've had and no matter how hard I've worked on this 'decision making' anvil I have hung around my neck, (or not being able to let go of the past, or past mistakes, or blaming myself for things that were never my fault, it just never goes away), I can't make the simplest decisions about what color shirts to buy as gifts for the only person I have left in my life.

Does anyone else have these issues or am I once again in No Man's Land between my two types of personal hell?

Is my church a cult? Right off the bat you wouldn't think it is. Everything seems so innocent but there's a lot of controlling going on. This church I went to is a small ministry that's ran by a husband and wife. They seem like very nice and genuine people when you first meet them. They have spiritual children who all call them mommy and daddy. They also all live together in one house. Besides being a church they run an entertainment business and all the spiritual children work for the ministry and this business. Some of the spiritual kids are also assistants of the pastor and will cook, clean, etc. What made me start to question this ministry was the fact that the spiritual brothers and sisters start to marry each other. They must always get confirmation from the pastor to pursue a relationship with someone. If they don't receive confirmation then you can't date that person even if you really liked that person. Also coincidentally every person the pastor confirms happens to be someone who become her spiritual child and works for the church and their businesss. It's almost like they don't want anybody from outside of their "circle" getting in. And the only relationship she confirms first are her biological children. Some other things I find strange are:

They move a lot, She rarely checks in on the people in the church outside of her spiritual kids, They don't hang out with anyone outside of their spiritual family, Some spiritual sons and daughters wish to be married but still after 10 years aren't but all of her biological kids are in relationships that were supposedly "confirmed" by God. Almost all of the main people in the church (spiritual children) join the church in their twenties (some are now in their mid 30s). They're always saying "I love you" to everyone and smiling but I can feel it's fake. Nothing wrong with being happy and smiling but it seems forced. One of the spiritual kids is a prophet but sometimes she speaks in a kid almost baby like voice when she prophesies. Is this normal? Me and my family feel something off when she prophesies. Everything has to go through the pastor. Again nothing wrong with seeking counsel but to not move forward with a decisison unless you get confirmation from the pastor seems strange to me. For example, if you have an idea for a certain project, business, or want to be in a relationship or purse a friendship with someone but don't receive confirmation (because she didn't hear a yes from God) then you can't do that thing. But how do any of us know if she is actually hearing from God and it's not just her own opinion getting in the way. She is human after all and sometime we hear wrong and make mistakes. I don't think a pastor should dictate your life. They can counsel you and give advice but not control your life.

Also for more context, some people who have been there for years serving the church left which also made me start to question this church. We receive the Sunday messages through a church chat and one of the spiritual kids who left their church was removed by the pastor from the church chat. For context this guy wanted to do a project for the ministry to help out those who were in a really bad situation but the pastor said no so he left because why would you say no to helping people.

I think the pastor also tried recruiting me (I'm in my 20s) because she would contact me more than the others in my family saying how much she loves me and how I have such a special place in her heart. Actually she doesn't even contact my other family members to see how they're doing. Why make differences and favor me over my other family members?

When I started distancing myself from them I think they started to take notice because the pastor would text but I wouldn't text back so one of the spiritual kids would send a text asking a random question and I texted back because I felt bad. Then the daughter of the pastor randomly calls me but I didn't answer. I found this really strange because she never calls or texts me. Are they trying to see why I'm not replying?

This last point is stupid but the spiritual kids will only follow certain people on social media. One of the kids unfollowed me a while ago. I don't care lol because it's not that serious but I find it funny and odd that they took the time to deliberately unfollow me and some other people from the church because we're not in their "circle". These are the same people who would comment "I love and miss you so much!!!" under my posts. Why are they being so fake?

What do you think? Is this a cult?

For context, I was born and raised in a cult but left as soon as I was eighteen. I am still deconstructing what had been indoctrinated into me and how my relationships with my family is pretty much ruined.

During my time leaving, when I was still in (a generally christian) high school, I would try and open up to my friends about how I was struggling to leave the cult that I had been raised in. Most times that I would try and open up about this, my friends would agree with me that they were also escaping a cult. This has happened in my adulthood as well, when I open up that I was raised in a cult, I often am met with others agreeing that they were also raised in one.

Recently, I have seen a social media trend where people are “joining an online cult”. It makes me mad as a cult survivor that people are “joining a cult” to seem interesting or funny. This “cult” is a mere days old, and there is no teachings or in-person meeting place (in my mind, this cult is a fake).

This “cult” has gained a following and was even named by popular vote. People post on social media that they “joined a cult”, and suggest hand-signs or deities for their “cult”. I have also seen posts that basically say, “I was bored this summer, so I joined a cult”.

This entire trend upsets me as a cult survivor. I have seen people on the internet worry over the reality of how cults begin, and think that this could become a real problem. I think it’s just a way for people to try and check some “join a cult” box off of their “getting a personality” bucket list. This trend seems like a way that unfunny people can seem interesting.

Fellow cult survivors, am I reading too deep into this? Am I being too sensitive over teens using the word “cult”? I don’t know why it upsets me so much, but I have dealt with a real cult and how it alters my sense of self.

TL:DR People already didn’t believe that cults are dangerous to leave, now TikTok has its own “cult”.

The creator of this “cult” is @notgigijarvis on TikTok and the name is “Children of the Waning Star”.

I went to Lake City Christian Academy in Williams Lake as a child, and looking back, it feels like something very wrong was happening there. The school was secretive, controlling, and isolated us from the outside world. Even now, there’s almost no information online about it, which only adds to the unease.

Rules were extreme, questioning authority was punished, and the environment left a lasting impact that I’m only now starting to unpack. It felt… cult-like.

I need to know if anyone else went through the same thing. Even small memories, stories, or details could help me piece together what really happened. If you were there, or know someone who was, please reach out. I just want to understand what this place really was.

Edit:

I attended the school in 2007–2008, and it was incredibly small—only about 25 students total, K–12. I was the only student in my kindergarten class, and in first grade there were just 2–3 children. All the students came from poor and broken households (which makes sense because we were probably easier to manipulate etc). One of the trips we went on was… strange—we stayed in a creepy church basement, which still gives me chills thinking about it. There was also a sleepover at one of the teacher’s houses, who, along with her husband, were the mother and father of the principal. It was just four young girls in their basement, and looking back, the whole situation felt deeply unsettling. All five or six of the teachers at the school were eerily close, almost as if the boundaries between staff and students were intentionally blurred. The combination of isolation, strange rituals, and the tightly-knit, controlling staff made the school feel far more manipulative and cult-like than any ordinary Christian school should.

Hello! I was a member of a cult for 15+ years, from ages 3-18 (I was not actually born into the cult, but I am functionally a cult baby). I've been out for about 6 years now, and it was recently announced the organization was closing. It has been very strange to come to terms with, especially as it makes up a majority of my early childhood memories and experiences.

Something I have been doing recently is saving every single piece of media I can find online. Every picture, video, pdf schedule, etc. I can get my hands on. (Okay, not all of them. only the ones I am personally interested in, LOL). I recently tried to pull from old Facebook posts, and mildly spiraled over the fact that they already deleted their page.

I think(?) it's helpful for me to be able to definitively put together the story of my entire time there. It also is a really nice reminder to myself of how far I've come, and of what it was like before the control became directly harmful to me. I am still afraid of forgetting the little things, of losing stories and people that now live only in my mind.

For those whose cults are no longer active: have you done anything similar with physical media? What are your feelings around the loss of something that was both harmful and deeply meaningful? Do you have any advice on how to cope?

I realized about a year ago that I may have been in a cult, and it's hard for me to admit that. But here are the factors that made me realize it's probably a cult:

-community living with little to no access to the outside world, with things like internet, music, or books not approved my the group forbidden. - communication with family or friends are very limited - work like crazy, like 15 hour days unpaid with no days off - everything is controlled- what we wore, talked about, how we did our hair, and how our time was spent. Everything. These are few red flags I see now. It's a difficult situation cause where I live this is not only celebrated but a normal part of life, like a rite of passage to join it. It makes me feel crazy for thinking it's not healthy. While in, I would have panic attacks and got sick a lot from how stressed and scared I was , and spent the years after believing it was my fault, that I was just too sensitive and not grateful enough. This is definitely a cult right ? Tell me I'm not crazy haha

im aware that i already asked this but i wouldn’t be asking again unless i really needed to, i already have 4 people who answered i just need one more person.

this is for a school project, the questions can be as non-personalised/personalised as you want, im really sorry to ask this again it’s just i really need one more person for the project.

I need to get some real life accounts from cult survivors for a school project that I’m working on (I’m sorry if this sounds insensitive or offensive in any way shape or form). If you want to participate, message me on here and if anything we can move onto a more private and encrypted messaging app (like WhatsApp), again, I’m incredibly sorry if this sounds insensitive or offensive.

It took me until last night to fully realize why my job has become so traumatic for me: it’s reenacting roles from my past. I grew up with control and autonomy taken away from me and forced to do what they wanted even when I said no.

My job is doing the same thing: I don’t want to be there and even applied for ADA accommodations to come into the office less because it dysregulates me so much and they denied it and are forcing me to be in that environment.

Also the servitude role: I was brought up taught to “serve” because that was my role as a lowly woman. I hate serving people. My job is in an assistance position where we “serve” the higher ups in our department. Do tedious clerical work whatever they ask me to do to aid them. Being required to drop everything if they give me a last minute task. I’m forced to set up/take down tables and food for events. My supervisor even lowered herself to fill up the department bosses coffee unasked like a fucking servant. I’m being forced into the same misogynistic serving role I was forced into in the cult. And any trouble and I’m always wrong for any small mistake I’m involved in, even if the higher ups were involved in it too. But others get away with mistakes. Double standards everywhere. My supervisor pointed out the difference in power between us and higher ups. We’re just glorified “help” and it’s disgusting.

The way my supervisor got me in trouble for my mistakes and the sneakiness etc. also mimics the toxicity of power dynamics between me and my parents.

Jobs can be just as abusive and demeaning as cults.

I'm not a writer. I think I just want to start telling my story and see if its worth the effort or if it would create solidarity and hope. And I want to intertwine hopeful and practical ways of reconstructing your life. I could have used that when I left. What helped you rebuild? Do you think this type of memoir or writing would be useful?

I was in an acting cult for years. The guru, Michele Lonsdale Smith was, and still is, abusive and controlling. She successfully created a cult-like atmosphere within her studio by opposing critical thinking. If you think critically, then you aren’t “willing to do the work to become a better actor” She demands complete compliance from her students, punishing those who do not comply with her demands and if they don’t, she humiliates her students, breaking them until they conform or leave. Her notes are pure power moves to see if she has her students under control and not about acting, which include pointless demands such as cutting their hair, firing agents, and breaking up with their significant other. She even pushes her students to admit things publicly that may or may not be not true. (In the cult NEXIUM, they called that collateral.) Michele forces actors to divulge personal truths, which she shapes, as she reprimands them. She has been known to push people so far that they change or implant memories. Her behavior creates an environment where her students rely on her as the gatekeeper of what is true, losing their identity, instincts, and sometimes even families.

The kicker is Michele Lonsdale Smith's acting techniques focus on weird "impulse work," which is messy and challenging for the audience to understand. Furthermore, her techniques prioritize personal expression and "truthfulness" over fundamental acting skills, leading to actors losing their instincts and identities. If actors stray too long because they are lucky enough to book work or can’t afford it, they are punished if they stray too far from the cult and told they aren’t serious actors. They are expected to follow her around the globe, paying her to do serious art meanwhile, building their guru a house in Tobago.

Michele's techniques do not prepare actors for professional work, resulting in a lack of success in the industry. Actors in her cult don’t often work professionally. They are either too confusing to get hired or they get written or fired. More than one actor I know, who has trained in her studio has been "written out" or fired because they cannot take direction and tell the story they were hired to tell. Despite Michele's insistence that her techniques are groundbreaking, they ultimately prove ineffective in professional acting.

If you’re considering training with Michele Lonsdale Smith Gracemoon Arts, formerly LS & Co. you should reconsider. If you studied with her and she left you with broken bank or dream and suicidal, you’re not alone. Her abusive and controlling behavior towards her students, the ineffective acting techniques she teaches, and the indoctrination of her students all point to a cult-like atmosphere within the school. Her demand for compliance and her opposition to critical thinking keeps her students from working professionally and funds her lifestyle through a small following of actors. It is essential to recognize the harmful aspects of this school and warn others in the industry about the dangers of getting involved with Gracemoon Arts.

Gracemoon Arts is not a legitimate acting school, Michele Lonsdale Smith is not a good acting teacher. It’s a cult. Stay away![See yelp reviews] https://www.yelp.ca/biz/ls-and-co-studios-toronto-2

I was in a satanic cult that carved a symbol into me for a ritual when I was around 5, I’d like to hear from others who have experienced something similar, do you recall the reason as to why it occurred? Do you know what the brand means/represents? How do you feel about the brand nowadays?

I've recently been fascinated with the stories that ex flat earthers are telling about their experiences within that community. Cults and cult-like communities have an ambient growth in the digital age, and I made a video exploring the psychology behind that way of thinking. I can't think of a better place to get feedback, so please share your thoughts. Wishing everyone here the best.

https://youtu.be/IoIi1s0qWRI?si=h0w212VYjafYeD71

Just wanting to check in with my fellow IFB cult survivors. I ask because I often think that I'm (40m) doing really well - I have a good job, a house, a lovely little family, a great group of friends...

...but then I will think back to how I basically had my 20s ripped away from me because I was in the IFB cult that required me to behave & think in a way that, essentially, alienated me from normal life. Having friends outside of the cult was just not an option. Doing things and having fun outside of the cult was not an option. When I hear my friends tell stories about the fun they had between the ages of 18-30, I get bitter thinking about the people that kept me from experiencing a very normal, young-adult life.

Ultimately, I'm doing great, but that bitterness simply will not die.

How is everyone else doing?

What would be your initial thoughts be when someone questioned the group/beliefs of the group? Were you fearful for them or resentful?

So I recently left this cult called King Jesus Ministry or El Rey Jesus because of the bullshit the paster is saying. I don't go to the actual church in Miami, there are other smaller churches located near Florida that are part of the same branch.

My family has been in this ministry for several years now and i have seen lots of changes in them, but i also see they believe everything this pastor is saying. The paster, Guillermo Maldonando, keeps on telling everyone that there will be a recession and that if you don't submit to God you will not go to heaven. He even convinces everyone that only his church will save you. I've seen the live streams of their services, and it gives me bad vibes. How Guillermo claims he can heal a person's missing organ, or how he does these "exorcists" to people "possessed" by demons which is clearly staged to keep people to stay at the church. And the thing where he like spits at people and the other person drops to the floor, sometimes shaking. I've also seen this stuff in person. I've seen how the pastor in the church my family goes tells people they will deliver them from this amd that, and when they do the same spitting thing, that person drops to the floor and screams like they are in pain. It really gives me evil vibes.

When my family first joined a smaller church that is part of the ministry, one of the mentors tells them that God can cure my autism. After that my parents stopped my school from giving me special Ed classes, and believing everything their pastor is saying. They cut people off their lives, people they love, even family away from them because they are not Christian and doesn't follow this ministry.

I don't even trust this guillermo guy. I heard controversy about him after his divorce and everything. I need to know what shitty things this ministry did because I'm afraid my parents and family doesn't know how cultish this "church" is.

Hello there! I’ve skimmed through this thread from a couple years ago. I was apart of this cult, and forced to do many of the classes as well.

Since becoming independent and growing I’ve discussed points I learned to friends and it’s encouraged me to do a deep dive (think the red thread, wendigoon, etc) video essay but it’s ofc taking time to get info together about Victor Paul wierwille himself, the major differences between Christianity, and ofc some of the more shady history.

I do not like this cult, the fellowship I was apart of used a painting of a ‘ape warrior’ to mock Barack Obama, told a person that their pain was the devil trying to keep me from going to their paid for class (she was afraid to be alone with my 8 year old brother as she was bed ridden). They were horrible, and I want more people to know but I want every detail I can get.

If you know info about the truth of their teachings, personal testimonials, or resources I can use please let me know.

If it’s your own personal testimonial please let me know if you’d like credit in the video (it might some time as I’m really wanting to be thorough with this), TIA

Before dedicating to a religion/ideology ask yourself these questions:

• What are they asking of me? Mainstream religions don't require a 300+ question personality quiz.

• What do they believe in? Google the religion/school of thought. The more information you have going in, the more you'll likely spot something you wouldn't usually agree with

• Ask yourself “What am I looking to get out of this?” and be honest with yourself.

• Ask “What are the stipulations of joining?” It could be a 6 billion year contract at sea.

I hope this helps someone.

Edit: Fixed the math symbol.

• Ask yourself: Is it SAFE to go into the building? I once visited a certain church and the only way in/out was a steep flight of stairs. No lulz are worth that.