r/cultsurvivors • u/Depends-on-your-god • Apr 04 '26
Survivor Report / Vent VENT: Be careful about who you talk to
As far as therapists go, make sure you do your research, make sure you vette them entirely. Make sure you know them so well you would let them babysit your child sitting on a pile of gold bars and still sleep at night. I found a therapist I thought would be suitable. we talked about some minor trauma. then I got into my survivorship. two days later I get contacted by the cult that had taken me, and started to harass me again to the point I had to change my number. When I confronted her the therapist said "well I had to make sure you were telling the truth, so she contacted and asked the religion the cult was based on to see if it existed. To her it seemed far fetched, but because the cult is tolerated by the religion and pretty much their wrong doings are ignored by the majority as "just a thing" they of course denied it so she tells me I think you are just a bigot and dismissed me from schedule. so do your diligence and make sure your therapists aren't your enemy.
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u/wagashi Apr 04 '26
Report! This person needs to have their license stripped.
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u/Depends-on-your-god Apr 04 '26
I've already done so. My report is pending. I needed to vent it on out.
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u/Feminine_Rage87 Apr 04 '26
I AM SOOOO sorry this happened. I hope they take your report as serious as it is. This is beyond inappropriate.
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u/Depends-on-your-god Apr 04 '26
I hope so. At the moment I'm coming down from panic mode. Thankfully I don't meet the cults criteria anymore so they wouldn't want me back but harassing people into silence is something they do well.
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u/Feminine_Rage87 Apr 04 '26
That is NOT ok. I'm so angry for you. The fact that she didn't believe you and went out of her way to contact them, it's sooo gross. I hope you are able to find some calm and tranquility soon.
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u/Depends-on-your-god Apr 04 '26
I hate her for what she did. And after I told her that the cult was a "secret to everyone" in the religion it's based off. Like the general religion knows this happens and says well... We don't all do it, but they all look the other way as well. So when she went to verify with the religion this group actually exists she outed me back to them.
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u/Feminine_Rage87 Apr 04 '26
OHMYGOD. Is she religious? I don't understand why she thought ANY of that was ok. I grew up in a cult too but I've only ever talked to my 2 best friends, my ex partner (we're still great friends) and here. It's so hard to talk about because of that exact reason...... people don't believe you or think you're exaggerating. Like no, this REALLY did happen.
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u/Depends-on-your-god Apr 04 '26
I found out today after it happened she is in the religion the cult was a part of. She did not disclose that before.
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u/Saphira9 Apr 04 '26
That's awful. My therapist specializes in people who are leaving religion or have already left and struggle with life outside of that environment. She does Zoom calls. Want me to send you her info? You'd have to be in America, in a state she's licensed in.
Or check out seculartherapy.org
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u/Depends-on-your-god Apr 04 '26
I'll check the link and if she does biz in NY we are in luck.
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u/Saphira9 Apr 04 '26
Dr. Grisel isn't licensed for NY, but she is for Massachusetts and Vermont if you want to use a forwarding address and not use state specific insurance. She specializes in deconstruction, religious trauma, issues from purity culture, interfaith relationships, and life after religion. https://www.drgrisel.com/
Or just find someone in NY on seculartherapy.org.
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u/universallights2911 Apr 05 '26
Yes!
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u/Saphira9 Apr 05 '26
Sure, Dr. Grisel helped me a lot. Her advice about grief came from actual studies and the experiences of other Atheists. She understands the perspective of people who left religion or a high control environment like a cult. I highly recommend her.
She specializes in deconstruction, religious trauma, issues from purity culture, interfaith relationships, and life after religion. https://www.drgrisel.com/
She offers online Zoom sessions if you live in one of these U.S states: https://www.drgrisel.com/states-licensed
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u/LaneVess Apr 05 '26
This is horrifying. If you are in the US, this is a HIPAA violation and is a federal offense. You can report anonymously here
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u/aikolittlebubbles Apr 05 '26
REPORT ! It’s insane that a therapist would contact a cult’s religious affiliation to “verify” your story, and then gaslight you by calling you a bigot. SO UNPROFESSIONAL and harmful...
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u/Anna-Bee-1984 Apr 05 '26
WTAF. No therapist should ever accuse you of lying.
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u/Depends-on-your-god Apr 05 '26
Yeah I know they shouldn't. This wouldn't be my first though. At least the other one had the good grace to dismiss me under a "conflict of interest" filing.
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u/Anna-Bee-1984 Apr 05 '26
Oh I know. I too spent my life being told I was the problem by therapists who believed my parents over me and then slapped a borderline label on me to make sure I knew that I was just an “attention seeking liar”.
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u/Depends-on-your-god Apr 05 '26
So we have shared lives!
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u/Anna-Bee-1984 Apr 05 '26
Potentially. I grew up in a high control family not so much a cult
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u/Depends-on-your-god Apr 05 '26
I was taken from my country, by the cult and placed in foster with cult parents.
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u/Depends-on-your-god Apr 04 '26
She is a Trauma/grief counselor.
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u/OldMotoRacer Apr 05 '26
w t f (?!)
you know this is fucked up... good job walking out of there... good job reporting her
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u/OldMotoRacer Apr 05 '26
holy insanity.... thats all kind of fucked up, not to mention illegal and an ethics violation
dude have an MD? report him to the board that renews his credentials
srsly... for the sake of those who come after you...
and btw this pretext about checking to validate the claim... thats not even a thing... like... someone needs to pull his license
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u/Depends-on-your-god Apr 05 '26
She was a non licensed counselor. She still has been reported. I won't know anything until after the holiday. Given her non disclosure about her religion being root religion of the cult, when I brought it up leads me to believe she was not out for me. She was suggested to me by someone I thought was my friend. Obviously they aren't
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u/OldMotoRacer Apr 05 '26
ugh thats some ugly collaboration and creepy asf
but good job getting out of there
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u/really__questionmark Apr 05 '26
Huh, I was told by someone that therapists are actually discouraged from researching like that particularly due to the large amount of power they could wield over the client.
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u/Depends-on-your-god Apr 05 '26
She was a "trauma and grief counselor" recommended by a friend. She wasn't a licensed professional. These are details I've come to find out and actions are being taken.
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u/Time-Turnip-2961 Apr 06 '26
That’s crazy. In future talk about your trauma/cult but don’t name names, keep it vague
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u/SuchSelection4252 Apr 15 '26
This happens more than you would think and I'm so happy you spoke up about this but so sorry you had to learn from experience.
High control groups have a wide network and even wider access to resources. It isn't hard to sabotage your support systems whatsoever. .
I'm sorry you went through this. Hopefully being validated here can provide some healing
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u/ibrokefree8646 Apr 04 '26
I can’t believe that a therapist would ever cross that line. Report them to the governing body that they report too (eg) if it was the EU/UK they will have been given a licence number to practice under. This is such a violation and it put you at risk, I would also contact the authorities and file a report so if this moron pulls anything like this again there is a paper trail that can be followed. Hopefully they will be struck off. I hope you are okay, I can recommend a few people depending on the country you are in. Please don’t let this discourage you from moving forward and getting away from the people who damaged you.
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u/Ancient-Elk-7211 Apr 04 '26
Report her to the ethics board in your state. Is this an actual licensed therapist or some sort of counselor/life coach? This is so wrong! I’m really sorry this happened to you. There are good therapists out there, but survivors tend to be too trusting. Your advice is very helpful that you need to really trust someone to discuss this.