r/cscareerquestions 18h ago

Experienced Toxic Job with High Salary or Peaceful Job with Low Salary?

What do you think?

15 Upvotes

47 comments sorted by

100

u/EndChemical 18h ago

Average job with so so salary

31

u/androidMeAway 18h ago

It's never as simple as this of course, so all the details are important.

That being said, you get used to high salary pretty quick, and then it just becomes a toxic job with golden cuffs

29

u/ohYuhtBoutMagine 18h ago

Peaceful and low salary. I had a high paying career that was toxic and insane. All set, my life and mental health weren’t worth it, and I eventually realized I didn’t want to be in that environment all day long. I didn’t care about money that much.

I also don’t have dependents, so it was an easier decision for me.

9

u/xlb250 18h ago edited 17h ago

I think toxic is subjective

3

u/Dry_Phone_3398 12h ago

Sounds like something my last lead would say

8

u/ChadFullStack Engineering Manager 16h ago

Until you’re married with wife and kids, high salary, even if it is toxic, is better for your long term financial success.

Plenty of new grads and young folks in their 20s can keep up with the FANG grind and save their first million going into their 30s. Afterwards that’s their F U money and wait for PIP and collect severance.

3

u/redfour0 13h ago

This happened to me and now unsure what to do next.

Enough saved to not scramble but still too poor to retire permanently.

3

u/ChadFullStack Engineering Manager 13h ago

Cruise if you’re still in FANG, wait for the golden parachute from PIP. Enjoy a year vacation since your severance will likely be 6mo-1y pay. Continue to invest with discipline.

Find a government or equivalent very stable job. Look for fully remote jobs. Move on to next phase in life.

1

u/chipper33 13h ago

Go to Asia and retire there.

8

u/DoublePrecipation99 18h ago

Just want to be employed for 10-8 year stretches in same place ,quality of work and learning ill manage myself. But even top paying employers suck at job attrition,we talk only about good paying companies but same companies suck at appreciating loyalty and providing long term employment. Cant even keep us ~2 years without hiccups,not even 2. Its a sweat shop field,sde people are oompa loompas,nomads

7

u/Jimsen3 18h ago

Depends on your tolerance for toxicity. As long as you are not exploited ofcourse.

2

u/TrailingAMillion 18h ago

Of course it depends on how toxic and how low/high the salaries are.

Generally my bias would be higher salary (recognizing that this one particular job is temporary and I’ll move on when I can), but if we’re talking just 10% higher pay and putting up with some truly horrific nonsense, maybe I’d go the other way.

2

u/Full-Brilliant-3613 18h ago

No job no salary

2

u/drew_eckhardt2 Software Engineer, 30 YoE 17h ago

If low is too low to cover your expenses, you need the salary which goes with the toxic position.

If low covers your expenses you avoid the toxicity.

Regardless you keep looking.

3

u/UnderstandingDry1256 18h ago

IRL lower paying jobs are also way more toxic haha. The problem is whether you get an offer for high paying one of have to cope with the shitty environment and low pay.

2

u/d-j-9898 15h ago

It really depends what you consider low paying. Is $70k low? $90k? Anything under $100k?

Depending on where you live some of those salaries is a very comfortable living and absolutely worth chasing if they have a better culture to go with it.

0

u/Titoswap 14h ago

Low would be a salary where you would struggle or live paycheck to paycheck just to have basic necessities like your own apartment, car, food, insurance , student loans. It depends on where you live like you said

1

u/shovon2464 18h ago

Just a job

1

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1

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1

u/QuitTypical3210 17h ago

Toxic job with low salary

1

u/noch_ulitsa_fonar 17h ago

I am ok with toxicity. Plenty of experience dealing with it in my old jobs and at home.

1

u/react_dev Engineering Manager 16h ago

Hard to say but typically you’ll find high salary jobs are also less toxic. They’re more intense but not toxic. Example they have ppl working 11 hours a day but they’ll happily help you solve a problem etc

1

u/YMBTPTOTLWRT 15h ago

Peaceful job with high salary next question

1

u/d-j-9898 15h ago

Depends how low the salary is but I'd prefer the peace over a toxic job any day.

1

u/mmprobablymakingitup 15h ago

i'd take the peaceful job if it covers my basic needs. a higher salary is nice but waking up with a stomach ache every morning before work isnt exactly sustainable

1

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1

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1

u/Typical-Box-6930 14h ago

My peaceful job with low salary that will end up with so so salary eventually with more years is so goddamn boring. Theres a reason government jobs attract older people. I hate it. I need competition and motivation and more money.

1

u/Time_Jump8047 FAANG SDE 14h ago

Willingness to deal with toxicity has a direct correlation with salary so like with all things it depends. I would deal with someone screaming at me all day for enough money

1

u/sudden_aggression u Pepperidge Farm remembers. 13h ago

High salary is always king, it's the only thing you can reliably measure before you accept the offer.

In my experience:

  • where you work within a company matters more than which company
  • a company that tries to lowball you is probably going to treat you like shit after you work there
  • trust your gut
  • it's easier to be picky about your next job if you're at a job

1

u/fsk 12h ago

In my experience, the real choice is peaceful job with high salary or toxic job with low salary. In every place where I was underpaid, it was a toxic environment. In the jobs where I was well paid, it was a low stress environment.

A job that pays poorly is likely to fail for other hygiene factors as well. If they had their act together, they would be able to afford to pay well.

1

u/x2manypips 11h ago

No job is best

1

u/wildVikingTwins 11h ago

I had both and currently at lower with super chill workplace. I am happy now cuz my mental health was really concerning back then that was the biggest part. Personally not worth it.

1

u/JonnyTsnownami 11h ago

I think its a false dichotomy. Plenty of high paying jobs also care a lot about employee retention and therefore invest in culture

1

u/lhorie 10h ago

That matrix actually has 9 squares, toxic, normal, peaceful on one axis and high, medium, low salary on the other axis.

I'm on the peaceful, high salary square myself

1

u/Toys272 10h ago

ive had average pay and toxic job

1

u/GaperClam 8h ago

Toxic job with Low Salary.

1

u/gifred 4h ago

I chose the peaceful job recently, but I'm near 50. It depends on your stress tolerance, mine is weaker after two burnouts.

1

u/Meta_Man_X 2h ago

Grind toxic high salary for a few years then go to a peaceful life.

If you don’t have kids, the toxic high salary is easier to sustain.

1

u/e430doug 1h ago

There is no such thing as a stable job in tech. Don’t seek out peacefulness.

1

u/I_cant_read_satire 17h ago

I hate to say it, but I’d go with the toxic job. I’d rather have an extra cushion built up so I’m prepared for a long job search or a layoff.

If it gets too bad long term, I’d just leave and find something else. But as long as the toxicity stays at work and doesn’t spill into my personal life, the higher pay is worth it for me.

2

u/chipper33 13h ago

That’s the neat part about toxic work environments, it will absolutely 100% make you a shitty person to be around as well. It will effect your personal life absolutely.

0

u/warrior5715 18h ago

You must find peace with yourself and ignore all the shit that doesn’t matter. This includes in and out of your job.

High paying job leads to more high paying job. Eventually one will be sustainable for you.

0

u/srmarruncho 15h ago

Any Job is peaceful