r/breakingmom • u/PerfectConstant1120 • 5h ago
update ❗ Broken Trust
I told my husband I want a separation and divorce. He is “committed to working on our relationship” and in the same breath doesn’t listen to me and gets agressive.
I tell him he broke my trust when he checked the phone records, and he says I broke his trust when I talked to a divorce attorney behind his back…even though I had told him for awhile our relationship wasn’t working and we needed a separation.
This conversation told me all I needed to know to be very sure in my decision
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u/Important_Phrase 5h ago
They always promise to change but they never pull through. Stick to your plan, OP and divorce his sorry ass. He doesn't deserve you.
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u/PerfectConstant1120 5h ago
He doesn’t. He never left Mommy. Gaslights me constantly. And aggressively tells me he is committed to our relationship…ok👶
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u/willow_is_leaving 5h ago
I told mine I'm divorcing him and he begged me for 6 months to try to work it out. I agreed to 6 months and now he's whiny because I won't go to therapy with him to tell his therapist what's wrong with him.
I never told him to go to therapy, and I didn't agree to marriage counseling because I don't believe it will work. Why should I have to do MORE emotional labor for him when I've already made it abundantly clear I want out?
These men take our labor so much for granted they can't even see it.
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u/PerfectConstant1120 5h ago
100 effing percent!! I went to my sisters to try to sleep last night and he told the kids he will never leave them and “counseled” them after he has been acting aggressive and slamming doors, making people scared for 2 weeks. My nervous system is done
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u/PerfectConstant1120 5h ago
We did couples therapy 6 times, one required a safety plan when my husband wouldn’t let me leave the house, jumped in front of my car and said I tried to hit him. And now it’s my fault and I gave up a long time ago. But also let’s try couples therapy again
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u/clammysaloon_4903 4h ago
The fact that he's equating you consulting a lawyer with him violating your privacy shows he's not actually hearing what you're saying, and that's the real problem right there.
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