r/ENFP 8d ago

Question/Advice/Support Does anyone struggle to explain things logically?

It's not a question for the enfps necessarily but I don't feel like asking elsewhere. So people often say they can't understand what I am saying.

I myself don't sometimes. šŸ’€ My answer is coming from 10 different ideas or experiences collectively and I can't point it out easily. It takes time for me to clarify things. Maybe it's being slow to process. And no matter how much I try, half the story is in my mind. The other person has no way to know.

I like to debate but it's hard because of it. Any similar experience or anyone who could overcome it?

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u/Positive-Strain-1912 ENFP | Type 9 5d ago

Yes, and I’ve been this way my entire life and I’ve only actually started to make a conscious effort in fixing this as I’ve gotten into my 20’s lol. One time in high school I had a speech professor who was an ESTJ tell me ā€œyou know I think you’re very interesting and you really have A LOT to say about a lot of things, but I just can’t understand you when you speakā€ 😭😭😭

When I was a kid I had a really bad stuttering problem bc my thoughts processed at such a rapid pace to where I couldn’t get them out faster than I could generate them. I also had an INTP get really frustrated with me bc he claimed the same thing the ESTJ teacher did where he had a hard time understanding me bc I spoke very fast and just didn’t sound logical enough for him to properly process what I was saying.

It’s definitely something I’ve had to work on, bc communication is extremely important considering that’s a huge part of how we relate to others, but I’ve also learned that not everyone is going to understand you, and sometimes that’s ok too. You just do your best and hope the right people will see you.

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u/Cold_Pomegranate7039 5d ago

My god I'm with you

People had a hard time understanding me!

How is it now?

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u/Positive-Strain-1912 ENFP | Type 9 5d ago

I’ve found that people who are really exceptional at reading between the lines and abstract thinking tend to understand me the most. Really concrete, black and white individuals are usually the ones who struggle with me the most.

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u/Cold_Pomegranate7039 5d ago

Exactly the same for me!

And they don't seem to grasp the nuance I'm adding.

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u/Positive-Strain-1912 ENFP | Type 9 5d ago

Yeah exactly, and there’s nothing wrong with that it’s just how they are. I’ve just had to learn to not take things personally with people like that bc we’re just different and that’s ok.

I’ve had to really learn to not let people like that make me feel dumb or inadequate, bc at the end of the day they don’t actually know me, and they’re not in my head so it doesn’t matter what they think of me. I live in a very colorful world and they can’t take that away from me. They can’t take away the beauty I see in everything.

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u/Cold_Pomegranate7039 4d ago

That's really beautiful! True I shouldn't let it get into my head.