​

Long story short:

Claimed ex was long gone → Actually broke up days before we met

Initiated exclusivity → Stayed active on Tinder

Begged not to breakup, Promised it would never happen again →

Talked about moving in, marriage, children → Several days later got caught on Tinder again after a month from the first time →

Fake apologies again → I ended the relationship → He went back to his ex almost immedietly.

Meanwhile, I discovere through a mutual friend that Similar behavior occurred throughout his previous relationship too, the ex doesn't know and is back with him.

🤯

I (40F) matched with a man (43M) on a dating app in early January 2026. We had our first date on February 6. On that date, he told me his previous relationship had ended in October 2025. I asked about it because I did not want to get involved with someone who was still emotionally attached to an ex. He assured me it was completely over and that there was no baggage.

For the first couple of months, we dated casually. We connected well, had great conversations, and I started developing real feelings for him.

In April, during a long weekend by the seaside, he initiated a serious conversation about exclusivity. He said he wanted us to move in a serious direction and described the relationship as something with long-term, even “forever,” potential. I told him I also saw potential and was open to exploring that. We discussed exclusivity very clearly. I explained that loyalty and trust are very important to me, including how we represent the relationship when we are not together. He agreed.

A few days later, while I was staying at his place and he was at work, a close friend told me she had seen his Tinder profile. She sent screenshots showing it as recently active. I checked for myself and found that he was still active and matching with people.

When he came home, I confronted him. He immediately admitted it. He apologized, said he knew it was wrong, and explained it as avoidant self-sabotage. He said that when things got serious, he panicked and wanted to feel like he had “options” in case the relationship failed. He insisted he had no intention of meeting anyone. He begged me not to end the relationship and promised it would not happen again. He even offered me access to his phone, which I refused because I did not want to become someone monitoring another adult.

I decided to give it one more chance. I was clear with him that there would be no second time.

After that, the relationship seemed to escalate even more. He introduced me to his father, friends, and neighbors. He planned to meet my parents when they visited and organized a day trip for them. He bought tickets and made summer plans with me. He repeatedly brought up the idea of me moving in with him, but I was not rushing into it. I was positive toward the possibility, but I wanted to take time, ask questions, and see how things developed.

He talked about building a life together, marriage, children, and creating a stable future. He even talked about setting up a home office for me and supporting me while I developed my work and studies. At the time, it felt like he was serious.

About a month after the first Tinder incident, he told me he loved me and then went on a work trip to Turkey. During that month, I had not been monitoring him. I wanted to see how the relationship felt and whether his actions would match his words.

While he was in Turkey, I checked Tinder again. His profile was still matched with the account I had used before, meaning he had not deactivated his account. His location had changed to Turkey and he was showing as recently active again. At the same time, he was sending me photos and videos from his trip, telling me he missed me.

I confronted him. Again, he admitted it. Again, he apologized and said he was not planning to meet anyone. This time he also gave an explanation about being with the guys and swiping together. At that point, I was done. I told him I did not know how this could be fixed, but I knew I would collect my things from his apartment and return his keys. The next day, I did exactly that.

Later, he sent me an apology saying he understood he had damaged my trust and that trust is rebuilt through actions (no mentiob of what those actions actually mean), not words. But in the same conversation, he casually sent me updates and photos from Turkey, which felt emotionally disconnected from the seriousness of what had happened.

A few days later, I replied that I did not accept the apology, that I did not see a way back from this, and that I would be blocking our channels. I blocked him everywhere. It has been almost a month and we have not been in contact.

Since then, I learned more from a mutual friend who showed me screenshots and other evidence. I found out that his previous relationship had not ended in October. It actually ended at the end of January, after he had already matched with me in early January. I also learned that he and his ex had another physical encounter at the end of February, before he and I were exclusive.

I also saw evidence that during his previous relationship, he had been active on dating apps, texting other women, going on dates, and presenting himself as single or available. In one example, he allegedly told another woman that his girlfriend was “just a friend.” He was also pursuing much younger women on the apps, including women around 18 to 20.

So what I originally understood as one avoidant/self-sabotaging incident in our relationship now looks like part of a much bigger pattern.

He told me his last relationship had ended months before we met. In reality, it seems they had only broken up days before our first date, and he had already matched with me before that breakup was final. He pursued a serious relationship with me, talked about moving in, family, marriage, and a future, while repeating behavior he had apparently also done in his previous relationship.

And Now, the cherry on top.. one month after I ended things and blocked him, he is back with his ex. ( I believe she doesn't know that he had been cheating on her in the past, and about what happened between him and me)

I am trying to make sense of this. Was I basically a rebound? Was he using me to move on from her, while never actually being emotionally detached? How do people talk about building a whole future with someone while behaving like this behind the scenes?

I am feeling heartbroken over all of this because I truly have deep feelings and could see a future with him. I don't tend to jump into relationships, and I feel that I opened my heart to the wrong person and now he gets to walk away as if nothing happened, and i'm carrying the impact of the betrayal and damage 💔

My boyfriend and I got back together after multiple issues involving him flirting/talking with exes. One of the conditions for me taking him back was that he promised he would stop contacting exes because it had already damaged trust multiple times.

I previously moved out of our house because the bad memories were too much to bear. 2 years ago, he cheated multiple times and always had someone to go to any time we had any sort of conflict. He texted other women and looked up ex lovers. He claimed they were just friends and argued when I said he flirted while they sent nudes and engaged in sexual conversations. He later claimed he did this for

“validation." He immediately slept with 3 other people and claimed it was because I threw him out after finding out about all the texting and looking up exes. He begged literally on hands and knees for another chance and promised he changed, it took me a YEAR to feel comfortable enough to start getting close to him again. I am unaware of any indiscretions during that year. I still haven’t felt comfortable enough to have full sex with him and he has pressured me and tried to make me feel bad and complained that I’m not doing it and he needs sex and has ignored all of my boundaries.

Cut to recently, while staying at my new apartment while I was at work, he responded to an ex from decades ago and had a long conversation with her. He insists it was completely innocent and “not flirting,” but to me it felt emotionally intimate and inappropriate given our history and the promise he made. I had asked him to change phone number so stuff like this wouldn't happen but he did not.

Some parts of the conversation included:

- talking about how the “universe keeps us connected ❤️”

- her saying she’ll “always care” about him

- him saying he’s glad she’s “still you”

- joking/flirty comments about OnlyFans and “old men like you”

- both of them talking about their relationship struggles and mental health

- her repeatedly saying she’s always there if he wants to talk

- him saying he’ll “100% be taking [her] up on that offer”

He says I’m overreacting because there was nothing sexual and no cheating. I feel like even if it wasn’t explicit flirting, it crossed boundaries, especially because:

1. this was already an issue in our relationship multiple times,
2. he specifically promised not to do this again,
3. he did it while staying in my apartment while I trusted him there,
4. and now he’s acting like I’m unreasonable for being hurt.

Now he’s saying I’m “throwing him away and don’t want him after he gave me everything.”

Am I overreacting here? Would most people consider this inappropriate in context, or am I being too sensitive because of the past issues?

What shocks me is that any organisation could label someone as harassing and disrulting them with very little evidence, seriuslt I read what they produced and half of it wasn't even accurate or true. And the ICO will do nothing because at least they gave some detail. I mean the right of acess is there for partly these kinds of disputes but I think I less you have money you can't realistically enforce your rights. It's as always a two tier system. But then that said defensive organisatiins like this tend to rot away and bleed out volunteers who have left becuade they were harassed or their rights were ignored and they were treated badly. I mens in the end I resigned and cut them off and blocked them from all emails contact. I want nothing to do and don't care enough about their existence to ruin their reputation. I just wanted my data dn to know what the hell they were doing with it after so many dodgy requests and weird letters and bulk emails leeks. If anyone was being harassed it was me. I was written to do many firms after it was clear I had withdrawn and was no interested in continuing further with a shabby process. I read their policies, and they don't follow them. I guess in volunteer world justice is just volunteers leaving when there is not accountability and the charity rotting stuck in its own governance failings. It's a sad world. You would think more would be done to stop these places sucking good people in. But in the end these places do get what they deserve that can't take feedback or won't modernise and deny people their rights and decide everything is harassment with like next to no evidence. I mean they aren't doing that well and it's not my fault that's the case. They struggle to recruit and is it any wonder when the attitudes inside the chairity modern compliance are toxic. And it hurts and maddening and it's infuriating but in the end I am already involved in better things. I will try and use article 16 and 18 and also try and find out what happened over the bull email leaks which happened multiple times but iI have blocked the emails of the charity and I have no rela desire to see any correspondence from them at all. So might have to get a representative. I am literally have wanted nothing to do with them for months. I literally stopped talking to them in the summer last year as I said I wasn't happy with their handling of safegauring and I was moving on. And out of now where they start writing allegations to me. It was messed up. Never the hell again. Never volunteering serioslys. Never. Again.

TL;DR Just wanted to get this off my chest.... I had this very close friend , we went to dallas together for holiday and the guy she was on a date with , i saw him and whatever , i had his number because she had called him on my phone before...

After they were done, i knew the guy was rich so i decided to be getting money from him and just have fun.... (They spoke for barely 2 weeks btw and she was tryna get money from him too) things got led up and him and i started getting "serious" as he would say but honestly to me i was seeing other people and just having fun but out of fear ,

I didn't tell my friend and then when he and i would argue he will bring up how if i can do that to my friend i'm evil, so i got sick of it and told him she knew just so he could shutup. one day we fought and then he went to her phone and told her to call me , welp...that's how she found out , she was cursing me out , crying and all that... went to her house immediately to explain but she chased me out. I'm not going to lie i was trying to do damage control so i was lying to everyone after that that it started this year but it was actually for like a year since ive been doing that w him and i was just greedy and didn't want the gifts to stop.

She started telling all our coworkers, friends , things we have spoken about to each other in confidence she started letting it out and adding lies and other stuff to make me look worse.

I kept apologizing until she did the unspeakable of telling my sister and calling my friends back home to lie and get them to stop being friends w me. So out of anger i did the same thing to her and told all her friends what she also had said about them and it got so bad her brother sent the messages to her mum and she came to my office to beg me about untelling her brother the fact of the her going on dates with 70 year old men ... she also told the guy all the other guys i'd been with which honestly idc but whatever ... so i did help her with untelling her brother ..... so what do you guys think?

**I feel like an organisation used regulator non-action to make me look like the problem, and I’m exhausted**

I was involved with a volunteer organisation, and after I raised concerns about how things were being handled, everything seemed to turn around on me.

Instead of feeling like the actual issues were properly dealt with, I ended up receiving formal letters that described me in a way I found really upsetting and inaccurate. There were claims or implications that I had been disruptive, unreasonable, or acting in bad faith. Some of it seemed to come from things I had never properly been told about before. It felt like a whole story had been built about me, without me being given a fair chance to see the records, understand the allegations, or respond properly.

I made a data request because I wanted to know what information was being held about me and what had been said. I wanted to see the evidence behind the narrative. The organisation refused the request, saying it was manifestly unfounded.

I complained to the regulator. The regulator asked them to review their position, but after the organisation gave more explanation, the regulator decided not to take it further and said I could go to court if I still disagreed.

What has really shaken me is that I don’t think the regulator’s non-action will be treated neutrally by the organisation. I think it will be spun as proof that I was the problem all along.

That is the part I can’t get out of my head.

It feels like this horrible loop:

I raise concerns.

The organisation writes a negative narrative about me.

I ask to see the records behind it.

They refuse.

I go to the regulator.

The regulator decides not to intervene further.

The organisation can then point to that and say, “See? Nothing wrong here. She was just being difficult.”

I know a regulator declining to investigate further is not the same as a court saying the organisation was right. I know it does not magically make every allegation true. But emotionally, it still feels like being erased and then blamed for objecting to being erased.

Now I’m left wondering how I’m supposed to correct anything if I can’t see the underlying records. I can challenge the statements I already know about, and I can ask for my side of the story to be added, but I have no real confidence they will engage with that properly either.

I’m not posting this because I want a fight. I’m posting because I feel worn down by the feeling that systems which are meant to provide accountability can sometimes become part of the problem by doing nothing. When an organisation is already defensive, non-action from outside bodies can become another weapon in the story they tell about you.

I don’t want revenge. I don’t want drama. I just wanted the record to be fair.

And I’m tired of feeling like asking for fairness is being treated as further evidence that I’m unreasonable.

So, the full version of this story is far too long for me to post on Reddit, however I have this link here to a Google Doc with the whole story.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1QiTwsQ72pwOm1MYt77-_cJl-cJrpu3Dlsf8miDQU670/edit?usp=sharing

For those who don't want to read a 14pg document, here is an oversimplified brief of what happened.

I (M, 31) had a friend (F, 30) for 13.5 years who, in late 2018, got into a long-term and abusive relationship with a man who would eventually become the father of her only son. In the 5 years of their first relationship, he would verbally harass her, emotionally manipulate her, deny her privacy, hold her financially hostage for at least a year, sexually assault her, and possibly also forcibly impregnate her. That relationship came to an end in August of 2024 after her abuser attempted to take his own life, failed, wound up in the hospital, was assigned a psychologist, and was finally convinced it was in the best interest of saving his life to just let her go.

Despite having wanted to be out of that relationship for at least a year and getting professional mental health advice on how to move on and heal from it, my friend decided she was not interested and would rather keep her trauma and go back to living with her abuser for the rest of her life. But rather than make that decision with any amount of confidence, integrity, or honesty, she opted to keep it a secret from her friends and family, proceeding to withhold information from us, and lie to us. Naturally, when her relationship began falling apart again, she came to the conclusion that the only way to keep it together was to open the relationship and get more people involved.

My friend then began lying to and manipulating a number of her close friends in a desperate and futile attempt to hold onto this relationship. She lied to her best friend, who was also in an abusive relationship, telling her that she was planning to leave her abuser, and then promised once she had, she would help her out of her relationship so they could be together, when in reality, she never planned to leave and was using her friend's abusive situation to force her compliance and her discretion. She set up an innocent woman with her abuser, so that her abuser would comply with the open relationship, and made no effort to warn said woman about the true nature of the man she would be getting involved with. When her abuser began to take a greater liking to the other woman, she began flirting with and lying to a number of her close male friends (myself included), promising an interest in a physical or friends with benefits type relationship, when in reality she was just collecting evidence that she was wanted by other men so that she could make her abuser jealous and force him to behave, after which point she would drop them all and gaslight them into believing it never happened. When that plan backfired, and her abuser revealed he had made up his mind to leave her for the other woman, she then jumped into a new relationship with one of the men she was leading on that looked the most like her abuser in an attempt to use him to replace her abuser. When that man wouldn't surrender his boundaries after 2 weeks of dating she then cheated on him with her abuser.

When she let go of most of her pawns, she began gaslighting them into thinking either it was all in their head or that they had misunderstood what was going on. When that failed, and she was asked to take accountability for her choices and actions, she threw a tantrum and ended the friendships. If she found out that anyone was still talking about it afterward, she verbally harassed them in an attempt to bully them into silence.

It has been almost a year since I last talked to my friend (July 2025), and since then she has refused to express remorse for the way she treated me or others, nor has she recognized or worked on her serious mental health problems. In fact she has moved onto lying to and manipulating a new girlfriend while still holding on to her relationship with her abuser.

I found out my husband has been paying models cash over the last 15 years to meet in hotel rooms so he could photograph them naked and in costumes. he says he did this approximately 30 times during the 15 year span. he said there were some years where he didn’t do it. he doesn’t know why. he has asked himself. We had a pretty decent sex life and I am pretty sexual. in his mind, he equates this to a strip club. but hotels are much more intimate. also there is communication leading up to meeting (allegedly noting beyond basic communication but more than you’d have at a strip club). Also you are coming home with a bunch of pics. also the most recent had Many repeats. Last person was approx a dozen times over the last two years. Also - I wouldn’t be cool with a stripclub. he knows he would freak if I did this. But he wasn’t planing on telling me (I inadvertently found out).

we have been together almost 3 decades. I want to kick him in the face. I would have met him at hotels etc.

I do think he has been very honest answering all of my questions. I keep coming with more. If his phone tracks with what he tells me, can I get over the deception?

I want to hate him, but cant help but love him.

I wronged a close friend. She accused me of hooking up with her ex situationship when I didn’t. She didn’t believe me and ended up ending our friendship over it. I ended up hooking up with him after our friendship ended. even tho things were not serious between them and they very clearly had no future, she is very hurt by me doing this. The situation is very complex and layered and k won’t go into that, however I’ve been feeling really bad .

For some reason I feel like I owe an apology even tho we were no longer friends and everyone in the story was single.

But everytime I think about reaching out I see a tiktok about someone apologizing to a friend and all the comments are just making fun of the person apologizing. I don’t want to be the laughing stalk in someone’s gc and I don’t want it to seem like I’m not genuine bc I really am.

These videos on social media of people bashing the person apologizing really makes me second guess if I should. Anyway I’m really torn. Should I reach out or leave her alone?

To ***** Corporate / Ownership,

I’m writing to raise a concern regarding conduct associated with individuals representing one of your locations. I understand that employees have personal lives, but when behavior connected to staff begins to affect members of the community and raise questions about honesty, professionalism, and judgment, it inevitably reflects on the brand they represent.

***** promotes values like discipline, integrity, and accountability. When situations arise involving dishonesty, misleading narratives, and interpersonal conduct that has impacted others in the community, it creates concern about whether the standards expected of staff are being upheld.

I believe most companies would want to be aware when circumstances involving employees could potentially affect workplace culture, member trust, and the public reputation of the business. I would encourage leadership or HR to review whether the behavior and decision-making of certain staff members align with the values ****** publicly promotes.

My intention in writing is not to create unnecessary conflict but to ensure that leadership is aware of concerns that could ultimately affect the company’s reputation in the local community.

Thank you for taking the time to review this matter.

Sincerely,

A concerned community member

I never thought I’d be writing something like this, but after thirty years of friendship, my best friend betrayed me in a way I can’t come back from.

She has this pattern of taking money from people for items she’s supposed to deliver, spending the money on herself, and then blaming the person who was supposed to supply the items. It’s been getting worse, but I stayed out of it because it wasn’t my business.

Recently she collected almost a thousand dollars from several people. Six weeks went by and nothing was delivered. She kept telling everyone that the supplier was the problem. The thing is, I’m also friends with the people who paid her, so I was hearing their frustration too.

Then out of nowhere, she texted me accusing me of contacting the supplier behind her back. I didn’t even know who this person was. I told her that — I don’t know their name, their face, nothing. I would never insert myself into something that has nothing to do with me.

She ignored me for days, and then suddenly told our mutual friends that I was the reason everything fell apart because I supposedly messaged the supplier. Thankfully, they didn’t believe her. I even offered to pull my phone records if she could provide the number I “used.”

She couldn’t.

Then she changed the story and said I messaged the person on Facebook. Again — I don’t know who this person is. She claimed she “saw the message” and that it had my profile picture. I asked for a screenshot. She refused and said she didn’t have to prove anything to me.]

That was the moment I realized she wasn’t confused or mistaken — she was lying. About me. To save herself.

Our last exchange ended with her saying, “I don’t show you all of me. I only show you what I want you to know.”

My response was, “If what you’re showing me is only what you want me to know, it’s ugly. And I don’t want to see what you’re hiding.”

I haven’t heard from her since. She still has a bunch of her stuff stored at my house that she hasn’t bothered to pick up. Honestly, I’m okay with the silence. It hurts — thirty years is a long time — but I’d rather be alone than tied to someone who would throw me under the bus without blinking.

I think I’m finally done. And I’m letting karma handle the rest.

I sit in the hazy afternoon sun, feeling its gentle, warm kiss on my face. Then it begins. I can feel it coming. It picks up quickly, like a pebble rolling down a mountainside, gaining speed with every second.

My body starts to react. My hands begin to tremble. There is a sudden stillness in my chest, then an explosion that ignites my heart—pounding and pumping like drills in the earth, desperately searching for oil deep below the surface.

A wave of weightlessness and weakness pours over me from head to toe. I feel as empty and formless as a sundress that has slipped from its hanger and fallen to the floor.

The intrusive thoughts start creeping in, like smoke curling under a door. I hear your voice relentlessly echoing in my mind. It bounces endlessly between my ears: “I love her.” “She’s the only woman who loves me for who I am.” “I want to be with her.” Back and forth like a game of Pong. With every bounce, I wince.

It’s the kind of agony you feel when you slice your finger on a knife so sharp you don’t realize you’ve been cut until you see the blood begin to trickle. Only then do you feel the pulsing pain, the panic of what’s been done.

I feel every heartbeat in my chest like the weight of a bowling ball. I pant as if I’ve just raced Usain Bolt for my life. Sounds fade into the distance, and images of you and her close in around me like darkness, wrapping around me like a spider’s silk.

My eyes close, and the sting begins.

One tear falls first, carving a path down my cheek. Then the others follow, one after another, faster and heavier. Each tear carrying more weight, more heartbreak than the one before.

My husband, who I have known since I was a child decided to leave me for my friend.

We were having relationship issues because I was insisting that he quit drinking, but instead, he decided to have an affair with my friend and actually left me for her saying she accepted him as he was.

He kept the house (farm) for himself, moved her into the home, enforced 50-50 custody of my only son who is seven years old at the time.

I wanted to make things work , it feels like I’m the living dead and a form of torture to see her in our home taking care of my child.

Totally devastated!

One thing I’ve learned is that betrayal can really change a person. It can shake you, break parts of you, and completely reshape how you see people and life. I’ve gone through it myself, and it honestly changed my personality a lot. It even played a role in why I don’t do in-person school anymore and prefer online school, some experiences and trauma just stay with you unfortunately and they can make you feel mentally checked out of the world for a while.

There were moments where I felt so drained and hurt that I just wanted peace the kind of peace where pain, heartbreak, and disappointment don’t exist. There were times where I didn’t even wanna be alive anymore, I even found myself wishing I could just be in heaven already, away from all the pain people cause on earth. That’s how heavy betrayal and trauma can feel sometimes. It really can break someone down if they carry it alone.

But at the same time, I’ve learned that pain can also change you in a way that helps you grow. It can teach you boundaries, show you who truly matters, and help you value real loyalty and genuine people more than ever.

So if you have someone in your life who truly cares about you, don’t take them for granted. Don’t hurt the people who show up for you with a real heart. Genuine love and loyalty are rare.

I’m at the point where I just rely on the HolySpirit now to just heal me and help me discern people because honestly I have trust issues now and I just want to see the truth because I’m tired of the hurt on earth. I know this is very deep stuff that I’m saying but it’s how I truly feel from the depths of my soul because I’m trying so hard to comprehend this betrayal which I can’t because I can see inside someone’s mindset. Being betrayed felt like someone took a piece of my spark and personality that I feel I can never get back unfortunately. I used to be naive but after this experience now I completely feel checked out.

Healing takes time, but it does come. Protect your peace, keep your heart soft, and don’t give up on life just because people failed you. There’s still purpose here, and there’s still good ahead. I also could take that advice myself to lol to not give up but healing takes time🤍

Apologies on advance for this rant was with a girl for 2 years and she all of a sudden blocked me and went no contact after asking for money and has blocked all friends as well her handle on Instagram is s1nfullypancxke_ and I'm her boyfriend and I'm slightly irritated as she owes me my belongings back and €6000 in transfered funds

I know that this betrayal isn't as bad as others but I just want to share and I'm sorry. Recently, like last month, I fought with a friend, just verbally because we are both hot headed. After the fight, I distanced myself from them because I felt bad for the fight because if I just shutted my mouth, we both would've just gone with our day, nonetheless, the fight happened and I apologized for what happened.

And then a week later, I learned, from a friend in the same group, that one of my friend, a girl, said that I physically abused her a long time ago. The friend who told me that, tried to defend me because she knows that I'm not that type of person, she said that I don't even like being touchy with women or anyone else of that matter. What felt like a betrayal to me was my 6 out of 11 people in the friend group believed that I physically abused her. Its just shocking that, they knew who I was and what my personality was, that I was like a father figure for them for years on end (they said it themselves). Who protected them, guided them, and helped them in their worst days, caring for them in every moment, never even punching or even slapping any of them. That was only my first fight in the friendgroup for YEARS. I really liked how only two of them really tried to defend me, but the fact that people just believed the other woman, just scares and saddens me that they think I was a violent person. Believe me or mot from what I say, I don't care, I just want to give my statement. Oh and the other friend I fought with was the brother of the other woman so there might be some connection to the story.

So my girlfriend of almost 3 years cheated on

me, she gave a guy that goes to her gym her phone number, he’s called every now and then to check on her and she would delete the call logs. One night i actually caught her with him in a parking lot because i have her location, they got dinner together and she came and admitted that she didn’t touch him, kiss him, no hug non of that she just entertained him for too long and they went out. I’m her first real relationship, and she’s already said she’ll nvr talk to him again, she’ll never go back to that gym, she’ll change, she fucked up she’s sorry, she’ll do anything to rebuilt this relationship and build trust. I wanna take her back because we’ve literally been together since sophomore year of hs, but then again that betrayal is fucking me up so bad that idk how to feel or what to do. What do you guys think.

My 5 years old friendship ended today. I am a 18 year old boy , i had a very good friend from class 8th from last year he started taking drugs and started stealing from his parents he tried to stop using those substances and succeeded a little his family and i were very happy and relieved. when he got better but last week he took money from me saying his father is very ill as he has diabetes and needed some money from me

For medicine . I gave him everything i had and when i called his father saying i gave his son some money for his medicine he got furious on me saying that my friend is abusing drugs and its all because of me and our friend circle. He said that we were the one who spoiled his son by lending him money and that he will take us to court by filing a case on us. Now, i am in a dilemma was it really my fault?

I found out about my husband’s long-term affair about nine months ago. He still has not fully disclosed the truth. He’s in therapy, but a major issue for him is protecting his image, so instead I’ve lived through nine months of trickle-truth. Every time I think I finally know everything, another lie surfaces. It’s exhausting.

Before anyone says “just leave,” I need to be clear about my situation. I have two kids under two. I left my job to raise them. I have no income, no childcare, and no immediate support system. I also don’t trust my husband to care for my children alone right now. Until my kids are old enough to talk and advocate for themselves, I feel stuck.

What’s destroying me is that I feel like I’m the only one suffering. My husband goes to work and therapy. His affair partner moves on with her life. Meanwhile, I’m left bleeding out emotionally, trying to make sense of what my reality even was.

I have strong urges to contact the affair partner just to remind her that I exist. I obsessively dig for more information because I’ve been lied to so thoroughly that knowing the truth feels like the only control I have. I know this isn’t healthy, but being trapped makes it feel unavoidable.

I know I’ll need to leave eventually. Right now, I can’t. Even if my husband somehow changed before my kids are more independent, I don’t know if the damage from the affair and the countless lies since discovery is survivable.

My question is: how do you cope with the rage, obsession, and need for control when you’re not able to leave yet? What actually helped you survive this phase without destroying or embarrassing yourself?