r/AmIOverreacting • u/Maleficent-Gap948 • Mar 02 '26
đŒwork/career Am I overreacting: Scheduling harassing me on days off
For context, I work in disability support. I love my job. I hate being called 6 times on my days off. Iâm part time- relief. When I have a day off I feel stressed all morning because thereâs a 60% chance Iâm going to be called to cover a shift between the hours of 6.30am and 9am. When I tell them I canât work the shift they guilt me, even suggesting that I cancels appointments to come to the shift. If I canât work the shift they want me to do they ring my supervisor and she calls me to âdiscussâ why I canât pick up the shift. It seems so disrespectful and honestly im so tired of it. Anyways, is this normal or am I overreacting?
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u/Maleficent-Gap948 Mar 03 '26
It is not in my contract to be âon call.â I technically have the right to refuse shifts.
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u/Icy_Net6145 Mar 03 '26
What do you mean âtechnicallyâ? If you arenât on call and you arenât on the schedule, then this is definitely a problem and theyâre essentially harassing you.
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u/YellowBrownStoner Mar 03 '26
Disability support positions are often treated like they are always on call bc staff calling out, when a vulnerable person is depending on staff for vital bodily functions like going to the bathroom, is more than someone calling into their cashier job at a grocery store. They have a responsibility to provide staffing for the vulnerable adult.
Now, it's also not an individual person's job to save their business. They need to hire a surplus with some dedicated relief workers who are paid extra to be on call, rather than forcing hourly workers into relief/respite care.
NOR
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u/Icy_Net6145 Mar 03 '26
Thatâs so crazy. I understand that itâs important to have staff for people in need but this is bordering on harassment. I definitely agree that itâs the agencyâs responsibility to have a surplus of staff for this reason.
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u/YellowBrownStoner Mar 03 '26
Oh it's definitely harassment and not ok. It's just a slightly different need than a job that could just wait til tomorrow.
Like I said, it's still on management to staff appropriately and not resort to emotionally manipulating their staff.
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u/Character-Solution-7 Mar 04 '26
And to pay the Emergency Surplus accordingly. They are basically trying to bully OP into shifts that they donât want for their base pay. If Iâm coming in to my PART TIME job on my day off, there has got to be a bonus
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u/_llloser Mar 03 '26
Exactly. If companies actually paid to have an appropriate amount of staffing, instead of cutting corners everywhere to save a buck, they wouldnât have to play these fucked up games with their employees. None of this is ever acceptable but seems to be standard practice at all companies now.
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u/hermionesmurf Mar 03 '26
Yeah my wife used to work in the industry, and their scheduling people were relentless. We were across the globe in goddamn Germany during her booked annual leave and still getting daily messages from her work in Australia
(No, she didn't respond to any of the messages)
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u/PoeCollector64 Mar 04 '26
I also work in a humanitarian field and yeah it's a similar thingâI can't just be like "ehhhh they'll manage" if I call in without someone being able to take over my tasks, because that shit could put someone's actual life and liberty at risk. But I also reach a point where I can't support all that weight on my own, or any of it when I'm physically too sick to get out of bed. Luckily I recently stopped being the only person in my entire department, so there's that, but it was a rough go for a while. Taking vacations felt like locking down for a hurricane
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u/geekyheart225 Mar 05 '26
Absolutely! This is a staffing issue that management needs to address through hiring, not through harassing people on their days off.
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u/BeerBouncer Mar 04 '26
Youâre right, it is more important. However, where you fail to connect the dots is that itâs the EMPLOYERâS job to staff the facility. Not the individual healthcare worker.
Management would love for you to disregard the above fact and guilt you to make their jobs easier
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u/YellowBrownStoner Mar 04 '26
I mean, if you r d either of my comments I did specifically say that it's not on the employee but the management to provide better staffing.
Hopefully that helped clear up your misunderstanding.
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u/R4CTrashPanda Mar 04 '26
Isn't ops job a relief position? When I read that. On call was the assumption. I'm curious what the actual terms of employment are. I get the feeling "days off" here are not ore established leave but rather days op hasn't been scheduled yet .
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u/Personal-Category-68 Mar 03 '26
What is part time - relief? Are they like designated to pick up shifts if people call out?
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u/ChaosofaMadHatter Mar 03 '26
In the current job market, not being a âteam playerâ can put you that much closer to being let go, whether itâs valid or not.
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u/thaleia10 Mar 03 '26
They clearly donât have enough staff or they wouldnât be endlessly harassing OP on their day off.
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u/Hallikat Mar 03 '26
That almost never matters to them lol a lot of employers will let someone go in spite of staffing needs to punish the person.
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u/Used-Cup-6055 crystal meth is not a salad dressing Mar 04 '26
Worked somewhere like this. Kept firing people for petty reasons and building cases against current staff and yet talking out the other side of their mouth about how they werenât getting any new applicants and no one wanted to work there đ
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u/Hallikat Mar 04 '26
I cannot for the life of me imagine why they werenât getting new applicants.
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u/Used-Cup-6055 crystal meth is not a salad dressing Mar 04 '26
I know! What a mystery! Luckily that place is being shut down this month so I guess they no longer have to worry about that đ
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u/zlide Mar 03 '26
Itâs a catch-22. They are intentionally understaffed to save money but they also want to have full time coverage so their clients donât know that they are intentionally short staffed.
So the way you get around that is you abuse your employees into being overworked, feeling like theyâre actually never doing enough, and then quickly replacing them when they eventually get burned out and quit.
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u/Lemon-Of-Scipio-1809 Mar 06 '26
This should be the pinned comment. And it's sad, too, because those disabled folks absolutely deserve reasonable and reliable support and care.
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u/becaauseimbatmam Mar 03 '26
In my experience these greedy businesses are far too stupid to consider the future or the potential consequences of their actionsâif they had any capability for that, they would have addressed their staffing shortage already.
To them, "I am critically understaffed," "I refuse to hire people because that costs money," and "I want to fire this person because they annoy me" are all completely valid positions to hold at once and are complementary rather than contradictory. The idea that they could ever lose business because of choices made by company leadership is not a thought that enters the room.
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u/Neveronlyadream Mar 03 '26 edited Mar 03 '26
Business is exactly like that. The furthest into the future they look is the next quarter. They're incapable of seeing any farther than that.
No idea if it holds true for OP, but when I worked retail they played that game all the time. It was easier and cheaper to push the people who were there to the limit rather than hire some more people to cover, so people would get burned out and quit and the problem would get worse.
Meanwhile, some middle manager would be patting themselves on the back because they were "saving" money on payroll, certain they'd get a promotion because of it, all while conspicuously ignoring the fact that nothing was running smoothly because the people they had were spread too thin.
When I was much younger, and we're talking 20 years ago, I worked a job where they wanted me to perform a specific task they thought couldn't be ignored during my shift, but didn't want to actually train me to do it because they'd have to pay me more if I was certified. So they just told me to figure it out. It's not a new practice.
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u/SamuelVimesTrained Mar 03 '26
But WHY is it always 'that' employee that 'needs to be a teamplayer'.
Why isn`t the rest of the team taking shifts they got assigned, or why don`t they call someone else?And why does the employee need to be flexible, when employers are hardly bending.
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u/Lunaeri Mar 03 '26
Itâs because those people have boundaries and arenât afraid to draw the line.
Then itâs a tougher fight for people like the scheduler to try and manipulate people who stand up for themselves, so they direct their energy on someone easier/less effort like OP who they can guilt trip into coming in on their day off.
Usually âthatâ employee is the people-pleaser that feels bad for saying no.
If youâre not on call, and youâre not scheduled, itâs a blessing youâre even picking up the phone to hear what they have to say, and if they ask you to cover a shift and you canât, the conversation ends at âunfortunately I canât.â
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u/AnonymousPandicorn Mar 03 '26
Work environments like that can kma.
I come on my SCHEDULED days. I'm on time. I pick up days when I can & am willing. I work well with my coworkers. I do my job well & stay after to make sure nothing else is needed. Good luck firing me. 9/10 they won't find better.
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u/Cosmicshimmer Mar 03 '26
Oh they ainât sacking a carer for not picking up extra. Itâs just not going to happen.
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u/Icy_Net6145 Mar 03 '26
That may be true for some industries but I canât imagine that happening at my job. Iâm a nurse and there are far too few of us for someone to be let go for not coming in on their day off.
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u/Chaotic_Baptism Mar 03 '26
Why are these weirdos in the comments coming for you so hard rn, I got what you meant.
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u/Icy_Net6145 Mar 03 '26
I dunno lolâŠapparently Iâm a terrible nurse who lacks empathy đ€·đ»ââïžđ
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u/Strict-Top-8796 Mar 03 '26
Ok well use ur imagination cause not everyone is a nurse
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u/Icy_Net6145 Mar 03 '26
No shit. Thatâs why I said it may be true in some industries but since I donât work in them, I canât speak to it personally. đ
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u/Chihuahuapocalypse Mar 03 '26
tell them that if they want you o be on call, they have to pay you accordingly. on call work gets paid more. NOR,this seems like a huge pain.
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u/Environmental-Age502 Mar 03 '26
Then put them on silent or block on your off days, while you job hunt. This is harassment, clear as day.
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u/Saufli Mar 03 '26
Oh op, im a nurse and a would say, i take care of myself.
The reason they call you, is becouse you say yes. Thats why the feeling is, on my day off, you fell like they will call you any time.
Had the same problem. I said no to every shift for one year after working 6 weekend with no free one. "You got no kids and you live right next to work".
I didnt care, find the person how did it to you. I gave my Patients direct number of the Managers, why should i manage there mistakes after them treating me like that.
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u/Internal_Section_793 Mar 03 '26
I used to work for a home health agency in the office. I completely agree with your statement.
We were required by the higher ups to "go down the list" and "call until someone took the shift". We were "held accountable" if we couldn't find someone to take the shift.
We were absolutely encouraged to call the people who said yes more often first. I started at the company as a caregiver, and I absolutely hated making that call... especially after I started teaching orientation and was required to get employees schedules. I knew they were off and had explicitly said they wouldn't/couldn't work certain days, and I had to call anyway.
I left that company with the knowledge that it was a toxic environment and there were absolutely better ways to handle the staffing issue...but that upper management would absolutely not implement those ways. I successfully changed many things in that company for the better, but that was something they refused to change.
You are absolutely right, you have to take care of yourself, whatever that looks like.
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u/Thedonkeyforcer Mar 04 '26
I was a supervisor in a factory setting. I used to try to call ppl in and this is def harassment and you are also right. I'd call the ones who told me they were interested in more hours first. Then I'd go for the ppl who often said yes next.
We did get a text service at some point and would send out messages. As far as I remember ppl had to opt in for getting the messages, we weren't interested in pissing our staff off. Many who never wanted extra work still opted in simply to be aware of what kind of shift they'd be having that day and that was fine too.
I'd seriously consider if there's other employment to find if my employer harrased me like this. I don't think the stress would be as bad if it was just texts about available shifts but the knowing that there's a supervisor call coming to yell at you and call you a bad employee? That's stressful as hell!
Granted, I'm in Europe and my job was heavily unionised but I'd NEVER harrass our own staff! Neither would my coworkers and if any of us DID, we'd be arguing about it internally and making sure it stopped before union even considered acting on it. It's bad business to piss off the ppl you need to do good work for you! Having happy workers was the same as having loyal and efficient workers too! It ALSO made my job way better to be met with smiles when ppl showed up for work.
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u/readytodiebynow Mar 03 '26
You are not on call. Do not answer. Ever. Maybe send them an email that, since it's seeming that they intend to have you as an "on call" work force, that you'd like to discuss the payment information about that.
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u/VolatileCornbread Mar 03 '26
Put their number on mute once you finish your shift before your day off. Unmute when it's time to go back to work.
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u/AnonymousPandicorn Mar 03 '26
Sweetie, there is no technically if your contract doesnt list you as "on call". They can go pound sand. Your life doesnt revolve around the company. Do you have HR?
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u/Thumblesss Mar 03 '26
I would just put my phone away for the day and put it on do not disturb. Put the settings to only favorites can go trough the dnd blok and you can have a relaxing day.
Either that or the nuclear route. Tell them the next time they call on a day off you will be looking for an other job. You will have to follow trough tough so thats annoying about this option.
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u/Nevermind04 Mar 03 '26
There's no "technically" about it - if your contract doesn't list these hours, then they aren't your responsibility. Block that number and enjoy your time off.
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u/Elixra7277 Mar 03 '26
The word relief translates as on call where I live and in the jobs I've worked đ€·
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u/Listakem Mar 03 '26
Block them on your days off. Their call will go to voicemail and you wonât have to refuse : youâll just be unreachable.
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u/ACcbe1986 Mar 03 '26
Block their number on your days off. Unblock them on your scheduled days.
Time off work is sacred. It's your time. You don't need it tainted by your job harassing you.
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u/Individual-Jump-5775 Mar 03 '26
Also wanted to say how unprofessional it is for them to call SIX TIMES in 20 minutes- that is crossing a line. Calling once and leaving a voicemail, and then calling 1 time again in a few hours if you havenât heard back is fine. This is insane and excessive
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u/KiloJools Mar 03 '26
Plus you can see that in the first call, they intentionally call back immediately so if her phone is on Do Not Disturb they can break through it so her phone will ring. That shit is foul.
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u/imnotnotcrying Mar 03 '26
Especially with OP saying this usually happens between 6:30 and 9 in the morning. No chance to even have a day to sleep in
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u/Catflet Mar 03 '26
If you put it on silent, then it goes to do not disturb, even if they call 2x, it still won't make noise
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u/JaredLetoBestBoi Mar 03 '26
Not sure about iphone but theres an option in the dnd settings to allow repeat callers through dnd. They might have that turned on
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u/ButtPlugMaster6969 Mar 03 '26
On iPhone you can set it up so that your favorites or any other specific contacts can breakthrough but other contacts or unknown callers wonât come through.
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u/superezzie Mar 03 '26
My Android has a setting that you can turn on that allows calls to get through if they call again within 15 minutes if your phone is on DND.
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u/Steups13 Mar 04 '26
I have turned that feature off. If my phone is on dnd, the only way you'll get through is if you're on my favourite list.
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u/SquishmallowBitch Mar 03 '26
People nowadays have no respect when it comes to phones. I also work in the disability field like OP but I schedule directly with people who I provide services. I have and parents who will call me at 6am over and over again when they know I come at noon. Most recently I had a parent call and text me 15 times before 10am itâs ridiculous. Op is definitely NOR. Voicemails exist for a reason.
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u/KoritsiAlogo Mar 03 '26
If someone calls me six times in twenty minutes, I can only assume someone has died, is dying, thinks theyâre dying, or is giving birth. Or maybe that a place they or I live has burned down. Things to that effect! Anything short of that is absolutely pathetic and the whole company should be ashamed. -_-
(NOR)
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u/Beautiful-Crab- Mar 03 '26
Fun fact - you can make a DND setting and turn it on and when certain people call it will send it right to voice mail. I do this AND youâll never noticed they called either because it doesnât show on your screen so no guilt
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u/Sensitive_Object_414 Mar 03 '26
Put your phone on DND
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u/LazerChicken420 Mar 03 '26
Even better. You can customize it to silence certain contacts/apps.
Make a home focus and just have work only on silence
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u/Patient_Library_253 Mar 03 '26
Roll a CON save to see if you can ignore the toxic work culture from your job.
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u/aeschenkarnos Mar 03 '26
These modern editions of Papers & Paychecks are so much less fun, the Mobile Devices expansion badly nerfed downtime stress regen.
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u/Zealousideal-Way3515 Mar 03 '26
I am an admin support coordinator and it is my job to cover call ins each day. I always start with resource, then part time, then float, then full time. I only call if someone has requested a phone call. I have someone on my list who is full time and she has requested I respect that she will not ever pick up and not text her, so I donât text her. This seems insane.
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u/Cheap_Doughnut7887 Mar 03 '26
What happens if you have no one who has requested a phone call on a day where you need cover?
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u/Zealousideal-Way3515 Mar 03 '26
We move people to balance the staffing at sites but there is only one person on my list of over 100 people.
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u/Cheap_Doughnut7887 Mar 03 '26
Cool, does it help being in a larger sized organization?
Im only interested because I used to do some moonlighting as an emergency out of hours social worker and would be occasionally responsible for finding emergency foster carers for kids. It was fucking horrible getting through the list of carers, only to have to resort to those who I knew wouldn't be available or were not on our active carers list and being told no by them too...
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u/mhih12c Mar 03 '26
Block the number on your days off. Seriously. If they gripe and you, tell them to hire more people to cover those shifts. Their poor management skills are not your problem.
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u/Pizza_Lvr Mar 03 '26
I agree. Block the number before bed and then unlock morning of next shift.
The problem is OP might work at a place with a lot of different phone numbers so they could still call them, just from another number.
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u/BootsInShower Mar 03 '26
Then tell them you got a new number and update it on all your work contact info. Have them call some random number, or get a Google voice number and just block all calls to that number when theyre off work.
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u/FoxSilver7 Mar 04 '26
My retail job had this issue. They'd call relentlessly on my day off so I blocked them. The second a manager or supervisor called more than once, they'd get blocked too. I played stupid the first few times they tried to talk to me about it, then just told them if they wanted access to me off schedule, I needed to be compensated with a work phone and pay for the hours they'd be calling and expecting an answer.
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u/aeschenkarnos Mar 03 '26
Just tell them âI spend my days off in Singapore. As soon as I leave on my last workday I go straight to the airport and I donât fly back until the morning of my next workday. So I couldnât come in even if I wanted to, sorry. Itâs a six hour flight away.â
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u/joydubs Mar 03 '26
Refer this to HR or escalate to a higher up manager.
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u/WellFluxMe Mar 03 '26
HR covers the bosses ass, not yours, but they should be made aware at least.
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u/devenitions Mar 04 '26
In this case they would cover the boss against a harrasment or burnout claim, so they likely will move in favor of OP.
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u/Jade0908 Mar 03 '26
I worked a job like this where I was taking shifts for people a lot. When I got pregnant and I took a day off because I was too tired the boss said âis your pregnancy going to be a problem?â And I quit the next day. No one deserves to be treated like a robot at their job. Youâre a human being who needs self care too. Itâs not your fault they are under staffed.
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u/Maleficent-Gap948 Mar 03 '26
Thats AWFUL. Itâs so sad how weâre just a machine to management usually
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u/Maleficent-Gap948 Mar 03 '26
Further context: for a support worker, im really young. And female. I mean like 15 years younger than anyone else who works for my company and sorta feel like they take advantage of me because I donât assert myself the same way an older adult would
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u/jonthom1984 Mar 03 '26
I work in the same industry and I think you're 100% on the money. Do you have any colleagues you could ask about their experiences?
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u/Proverbs21-3 Mar 03 '26
OP, I went to work in a nursing home the day after my 16th birthday (the youngest age I could provide direct patient care here in the USA). I lived 2 short blocks away from the nursing home and was most definitely the youngest staff on the care-giving staff, if not the entire nursing home. .
Every time someone else called in sick, car broken down, snowed in, whatever, it did not matter why the other person was calling in, the nurse in charge of scheduling always called me first. I could have just worked a night shift/day shift double and if someone called in for that night's night shift, they would still call me! Furthermore, they'd end the call by saying "I know it is already 10:35pm and the shift starts at 11pm but because you live so close, I expect you to be there on time for the start of the shift." I'd wash my face, brush my teeth, throw on a uniform, pack a PBJ sandwich and an apple, and start walking! I was happy to be going to work as it meant more $ for a car, gas, and college tuition,
Because I had finished high school several years early and had to sit out two semesters to get my driver's license, a car, and save some money for tuition before I could start going to college, I was desperately anxious to earn some money for a car, money for gas to get back and forth to the college which was a 45 minute drive, each way, and to help pay for my college tuition, too, so I accepted every shift they offered me. I was also bored silly sitting at home with nothing to to do and honestly, I liked the patients and enjoyed the work so I just kept saying "Yes, ma'am, I'm on my way in." I was also keenly aware that I had to get the money for college tuition, too, so would happily work all of my regular shifts and any extra shifts offered to me, too. (Today, it almost sounds silly because this was back in the day when it was $17-$25 per credit hour for tuition and payable right up until 48 hours before the class started but this was a lot of money in the 1970s. In the late 70s, minimum wage was was $2.65, gas was 65-70 cents a gallon )
Unbeknownst to me, it was just so much easier for the scheduling nurse to call me because she knew I walked to work so there was never any worry about car trouble or transportation issues, I did not have children or a husband so never had to worry about childcare or checking with my husband before accepting an extra shift, and because I was young and so eager to work, I always agreed to come in. The scheduling nurse just kept calling me first and never had to make a second call to anyone else because I just kept saying "Yes, I'm on my way in." and showing up with a smile on my face to do the work I enjoyed, taking care of patients I liked, working alongside co-workers I liked (and adding up my overtime quietly in my head as I walked home after each OT shift).
Finally, after approximately 7-8 months of this, two of my co-workers took me aside one night as I was coming off of working a day shift/evening shift double and had just been asked to return the following morning for a day shift to cover a call-out for a sick co-worker and explained to me that none of them ever received phone calls or requests to fill in for call-outs anymore because all those shifts were being offered to me, every time, and that the loss of overtime was causing them to have difficulties paying their monthly bills, a couple of them had to take take on second jobs since they could no longer count on getting 4 days of OT pay each month! I had been unaware that my coworkers had, prior to my hiring, been relying on those 3- 4 overtime shifts to be able to manage their bills. I had been unaware that the scheduling manager was not even bothering to offer shifts to any of the other staff because it was easier for her to just call me because I never said "No", always managed to get there on time, and did not complain. Looking back, I wonder why it took my co-workers so many months to approach me and explain the situation to me. I wasn't trying to take away anyone's overtime, I certainly wasn't trying to make anyone's financial life difficult; as far as I knew, I was simply answering a call for help when the nursing home needed a shift filled.
I began asking "Have you tried calling anyone else yet or am I the first call?" before automatically agreeing to come in. I has been too naive to realize that the nursing home was calling me every time there was a call-out because 1) I did not say "No" or "Let me see if I can arrange childcare and get back to you." or "I could come in and work most of the shift but I'd have to leave 1.5 hours early so I can get my children up, dressed and get them to school on time." and 2) because, as a new hire without experience, I was one of the lowest paid care-givers on staff so paying me overtime was much less expensive than paying a more experienced care-giver overtime (some of those women had been there for more than 20 years and even with just COLA raises over that amount of time, were making considerably more than I was).
NOR It's possible that some of this is coming into play in your situation, too. They may be trying to take advantage of your youth, your 'newness to the staff" and the fact that paying you OT will probably cost them less than paying OT to another employee who has been there longer and makes more money than you do. If you are not required to be on call, simply silence that number and allow them to leave messages, if they want. Call them back hours later, about 10pm, with a fake apology "I've been out on the sailboat all day (or on the golf course, or treating myself to a spa day or did not bother to charge my phone up because I knew I had no responsibilities today or left my phone in my briefcase and never heard it ringing, anything remotely plausible) and just now saw these messages as I was preparing my stuff for work tomorrow. I hope you were able to solve your crisis, it must have been a doozy since I see you called me 6 times in 20 minutes! I am sorry I was not able to take your calls. I'll see you at work tomorrow. Good night!" This way, you do acknowledge that you eventually saw the calls, even if it was just as you were gathering your stuff and getting ready for work the following day, you remind them that you had no obligation to them that day, and you subtly call them out for the harassment factor or calling you 6 times in 20 minutes.
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u/Maleficent-Gap948 Mar 03 '26
Hey thanks for replying to my post! This does sound a lot like my situation, some of the older women i work with have been saying that they have been struggling to get hours while I had to fight to not work every day. We donât get paid overtime though and I think I am on the same pay as everyone else as I have the same qualification (just how it works where I live). Such a weird situation!
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u/Used-Cup-6055 crystal meth is not a salad dressing Mar 04 '26
I had a similar situation in the 2010s except my coworkers were insane. I was the new person who picked up shifts and they were mad that I got more hours than them. Cue me taking less shifts because they said they wanted the hours and then they would tell my boss no when he would call them. And then they would call in and get mad if I covered their call ins! It was insane. My boss was a very easily manipulated man and he let these teenage girls run his business for him practically. Another coworker and I sat him down and laid all this out for him and he eventually ended up letting the two girls go who were being the problem and things leveled out. Iâm glad your coworkers were coming from a good place!
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u/mankytoes Mar 03 '26
"I am currently working as many hours as I feel I am capable of, considering my mental wellbeing and other commitments. I will not be picking up any extra shifts beyond my contracted hours at this time, I will let you know if that situation changes. Please do not call me outside of work".
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Mar 03 '26
Look at it this way, you have leverage in this situation. Them being desperate enough to call you 6 times in 20 mins shows they clearly donât have enough people making you more valuable. Tell them NO I will not be coming in today goodbye or tell them I can come in but due to it being my day off I would need 1.5x pay to make it happen. A lot of jobs do not deserve kindness or professionalism especially when itâs not mutual and they will keep treating you like this ifff you let them
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u/howtobegeo Mar 03 '26
Yeah, I feel like you need to have a conversation that your days off are completely off and you are not available to pick up any shifts.
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u/Unfck-my-life Mar 03 '26
Hell no. Iâd feel no qualms is not answering.
Unless youâre on call, you have no reason to answer them! Â
If they ask why you donât answer, just say âSorry I keep my phone on silent when Iâm with my familyâ.
Theyâll get the idea eventually.
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u/Remarkable_Truth_134 Mar 03 '26
This is abuse of power guilting you and extremely unprofessional. Is there an HR team you can contact? NOT OR.
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u/Ecstatic_Chip_8550 Mar 03 '26
Thatâs way too much. Can you just block them while busy then unblock when youâre able to cover?
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u/TheGoosiestGal Mar 03 '26
NOR I know how bad the guilt tripping can be. When I did in home care like 8 years ago I was constantly being called in last minute to cover shifts and the office employees were always so aggressive and guilt trippy because they had to be the ones to go in if none of us agreed, and of course theyre all buddy buddy with management cause they sit with them all day so theyre gonna be able to get your boss on their side.
Just know they literally cannot afford to punish you for this. They do not have the staff to fire you unless you're commiting crimes
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u/kimness1982 Mar 03 '26
Ugh, my husband used to do this kind of work when we first met and they still texted him CONSTANTLY after he quit to pick up shifts. This is so intense and you are NOR.
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u/apscisio Mar 03 '26
I used to work in vocational support and this would happen to me. I almost wonder if youâre from the same company because this is EXACTLY it. I quit and got a job doing residential support instead, and its been much better.
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u/MadamUnicornOfDoom Mar 03 '26
If you are on call⊠this is a problem for you. If not⊠wow thatâs insanity.
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u/Ok_Nothing_9733 Mar 03 '26
Theyâre not on call
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u/MadamUnicornOfDoom Mar 03 '26
Yeah thatâs insane then. Calling once is fine, twice is pushing it⊠this many times is fuckin harassment.
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u/Ok_Nothing_9733 Mar 03 '26
Agree, itâs harassment for sure and I would be looking for another job
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u/glitterbug0927 Mar 03 '26
NOR, I also work in disability support and have disabled voicemail on my phone and I have a do not disturb setting on my phone that is called Day Off that basically turns off notifications for texts and calls from my managers. I also make a point to tell them that I don't keep my phone with me when I'm at home.
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u/yullari27 Mar 03 '26
"I am not on call. You need to hire another person or contact my coworkers that are asking for more hours. 6 calls in this time span is excessive. I am not rescheduling appointments. I made them for my day off, respecting the schedule. I'd ask that you please do the same and refrain from calling me more than once again. If I'm willing and able to take an extra shift, I will call you back. We can discuss further with HR present during my next scheduled shift if need be."
I "sure thing"ed my way into 80 hour work weeks and an autoimmune condition. Shut it down now, or it'll get worse.
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u/Shoddy-Walk-3257 Mar 03 '26
I donât know much about this. But seems like NOR based on the context presented. If you are part time with the agreement to pick up shifts but you donât. Thatâs different. But side note to that. Thatâs waaaayyyyy to many calls and very overbearing
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u/bennettroad Mar 03 '26
This sounds insanely toxic. Can you do the work you do for a different company?
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u/JinxFae Mar 03 '26
This happened to me. Donât pick up the phone ever. If they ask why, âsorry, I was sleepingâ or âI turn off my phone on my off-daysâ. They canât force you to be available because they are not paying you to be on call. It stopped completely for me when they realized calling me was a waste of time.
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u/Catch_Em_Cards Mar 03 '26
Def not normal in my opinion. Not sure how if youâre âon callâ. If so that could be why theyâre calling you like that. That sounds frustrating. Try to find something else youâll be happier with, if possible. Sometimes the grass isnât always greener on the other side.
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u/KeithandBentley Mar 03 '26
INFO- Are you on call? If yes, then thatâs the job, and find a non-on call job. If youâre not on call, then tell them you are unavailable during non scheduled days. You donât need to tell them more than that, but if you feel the need to white lie tell them you have another shift elsewhere - or I used to say âIâm at brunch and Iâve been drinkingâ to which they werenât legally allowed to let me come in.
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u/ReflectionSuperb9043 Mar 03 '26
Admittingly I used to be guilty of thinking part time people were there to help cover shifts we needed until I realize the people that are part time are part time for a reason and are doing things in the other hours of the day whether itâs another job, kids, health reason or simply because they donât want to work over a certain hours and suit their life financially to fit that, I respect that now!
I think people get in there head that part time people should be willing to work more than they do which isnât fair because thatâs not was agreed on when you were hired
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u/feathernose Mar 03 '26
NOR. This is really unacceptable behavior from an employer! You work part time for a reason. You have the right to have time for your own plans during these days.
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u/Rose1982 Mar 03 '26
I worked in at home nursing scheduling before and it was soul sucking. The higher ups are absolutely pushing and endorsing this. But you need to hold your ground and only answer the phone if you are interested in picking up shifts. Donât feel guilty. You arenât doing anything wrong. Make a day off âfocusâ on your phone so you donât get alerts from that number.
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u/Independent-Lynx9476 Mar 03 '26
MOR
If you are classified as part-time relief you may want to check any contracts or documents you signed as part of on boarding or part of your offer letter and make sure you aren't contractually obligated to accept a certain percentage of calls or shifts that you get calls for. If so, you might be getting the axe soon as it sounds like they are starting to elevate you not accepting coverage calls.Â
If you don't want to be part of the "relief" team, maybe talk to your supervisor, but I'm guessing it's part of the job to be expected.Â
All of that said, the number of calls is a bit much and a bit unprofessional, as is the weird bit that they say you should cancel appointments to cover their shifts and while you do have right to refusal, I urge you to check anything you signed.
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u/Beneficial-Guess2140 Mar 03 '26
Youâre a part time relief employee, is it your purpose to be called in when someone calls out? You say you can technically turn down shifts, which implies they expect you to be available when needed.Â
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u/Calgary_Calico Mar 03 '26
OP already said they are not on call. They're scheduled and did not sign up to be on call. Even if they were, 6 calls in 20 minutes is outright harassment
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u/Beneficial-Guess2140 Mar 03 '26
Part time relief is generally an on call position. The way she said she can âtechnicallyâ refuse, makes it clear sheâs expected to go in when someone else doesnât. If thatâs the case, ignoring calls isnât going to be the way to keep a job.Â
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u/Troth70 Mar 03 '26
It is normal and NOR.
The pay in social services is poorâbecoming worse because of funding cutsâso places canât keep jobs filled with reliable people. Thus, they desperately call you.
Itâs unfair and sucks. Donât be afraid to set a boundary â they canât fire you or they will be even more short-handedÂ
Sorry you are experiencing this. I am sure you care about the people you serve. Thanks for what you do
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u/Jumpy_Cod9151 Mar 03 '26
This comment is one I wish more people were paying attention to... IMO many in this thread are missing the mark. It is not as simple as "this company is bad." Please, reach out to your government officials, obtain sponsers, research what you need to help write grants. Companies resort to these abhorrent practices when they become desperate without funding, and their clients (re: patients) become desperate as well, it is not just malicious intent on their part. The systems they (and those who need them) rely on, are being actively defunded. That is what is failing. Quitting one bad job won't save you- it's the healthcare system you need to reform. Please, reach out.
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u/Melodic-Advice9930 Mar 03 '26
NOR. OP, you should turn on the DND, set it to stay on until you leave your location (aka home), and toggle off the âallow repeated callsâ in the dnd settings. That should stop them from being able to bypass the dnd.
This is horrible behavior on their part.
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u/PageOf_Wands Mar 03 '26
My sister went through this exact thing!!! Did they explain your responsibilities for off hours during your interview? They explicitly told her she wouldn't be on call and then was!
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u/Greatdanesonthebrain Mar 03 '26
I donât know where you are located, and Iâm not sure if in the US other states have laws like California.Â
But if you are in California this is harassment. Being on call is also supposed to be controlled, which means you get paid for being on call because you do not have autonomy in your sort of day off, and are obligated to answer and work. You see this a lot in healthcare. My neighbor is an on call general anesthesiologist. But he is paid an entire 8 hour shift for the days he is on call. Per California labor codes/laws.Â
Check your labor laws.Â
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u/queen_bean5 Mar 03 '26
I didnât even need to open the caption to know you were in disability support lmao
NOR. I understand they have to ring everyone because itâs important that people have support so they need to check, but itâs inappropriate to guilt trip you/suggest you cancel appointments and wildly inappropriate that your manager rings to âdiscussâ why you didnât pick up a shift.
I work in disability and often get calls for shifts. I often say no. They respect that. I respect that theyâll call every time anyway, because on the off chance I say yes it could make a huge difference to the client. But they never guilt me or try to âdiscussâ why I said no.
NOR
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u/lifeinwentworth Mar 03 '26
I work in disability too. This is shocking honestly. I know how understaffed places can be and how shitty they can treat staff. You really have to be able to stand up for yourself or they'll pull shit like this - though 6 calls in 20 minutes is particularly bad!
You need to tell them directly not to contact you on your days off or - if you wish - that if you don't answer once they're not to call again.
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u/cybertitan088 Mar 03 '26
For that type of work, most places are like this. I did it for 11 years, and unionized a company because I was tired of how unprofessional management was. One of the things we got in our agreement tackled this exact issue. 1 call, leave a voicemail, no means no, call list goes by seniority and overtime. It made scheduling staffs job a lot easier since they werenât hounding people to come work. If a shift couldnât be filled, the managers had to pick up the slack.
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u/Cool_Relative7359 Mar 03 '26
Start muting your phone after you answer no to the shift change, or keeping it on DND during your off hours.
If they ask, say you started hiking as a hobby or spelunking and signal isn't great when you're out and about.
Stop taking the supervisor's check in call after you decline, you aren't actually obligated to give them a reason.
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u/Rusty_Tap Mar 03 '26
Set an alarm for days that you are not yet scheduled to work, but are available. Call them repeatedly at 3-4am. When they call back tell them you were going to offer to work but have already made plans now so you can't come in.
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u/AdornedSpaghetti Mar 03 '26
Hahahahahaahahah I saw this picture and thought bet this is disability support
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u/horselover65655 Mar 03 '26
NOR, quit this soul sucking job and find one where you clock in, do your job, go home...forget about it until the next shift.
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u/HotBitchDisease Mar 03 '26
I recently left this career for this exact reason. There was zero work/life balance and I was being completely taken advantage of. I am so sorry OP. This should not be considered normal for any job!
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u/Notathrowawaysleeve Mar 03 '26
NOR. Iâve quit a job over this- it was a casual, second, overnight job and would call me during sleeping hours- like 1pm. Imagine having the nerve to call someone at 1 am.
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u/catatoniccutie Mar 03 '26
When I worked for the same type of agency as a âreliefâ staff, that meant that I had no set schedule and was to be used to full in where needed, including last minute shifts. Can you ask them to go from being PT Relief staff to PT scheduled staff? It sounds like they are using a loophole not to have to pay you additional benefits but still using your labor a massive amount.
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u/TrailerParker59 Mar 03 '26
MOR. If you were hired as the relief shift it makes sense why they expect you to work when someone needs relief from their shift. It sounds like if you want to be part time though, you shouldnât have a set schedule that theyâre trying to call you out of. If both of these things are the case it would make sense to have one or two days a week guaranteed and youâre covering shifts for the other days you wish to work
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u/Logical_Buffalo7156 Mar 03 '26
This post makes me glad that I just mute all of my work stuff when Iâm not at work
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u/Current_Mess_9586 Mar 03 '26
NOR
When I worked in the hospital we had the on-call pager... You go paid literally $3 an hour for every hour you held it and if you got paged in you got time and a half. But this way we KNEW what days to be flexible because we were the one with the pager. If you weren't on shift and didn't have the pager you weren't responsible for answering.
Your company needs to do better at planning on-call personnel for when there's a situation like this.
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u/PeachManzie Mar 03 '26
This is literally illegal in my country. Not over reacting at all. Put your foot down
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u/BellSeveral2891 Mar 03 '26
This is kind of an extreme suggestion, but maybe you can set up a âdo not disturbâ profile on your phone called âday offâ which has the scheduling number blocked. Iâm thinking a do not disturb profile would be easier to turn on and off than manually blocking and unblocking the number.
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u/Used-Cup-6055 crystal meth is not a salad dressing Mar 03 '26
Iâd block their number. This is harassment honestly. I have definitely blocked numbers from jobs before so they couldnât call me on my days off. I will work my schedule and if you need me to pick up extra hours you either need to ask me while Iâm already at work or just schedule me those hours. And Iâd be looking for a different job because they wonât stop.
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u/Whatagoodtime Mar 03 '26
NOR! Set your boundaries.
This is why I love the new law passed in Australia. Itâs illegal for a company to call you on your day off; they can contact you once if offering a shift, but arenât allowed to harass you or expect anything from you. You have no obligation to accept the call or to take a shift, and that canât impact your work in any resultant way.
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u/Accomplished_Poetry4 Mar 03 '26
You said you're part-time relief though. Isn't the relief part supposed to be to come in when needed, too?
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u/appropriateprofit331 Mar 04 '26
NOR. Iâve worked in disability support and maintaining a healthy work-life balance can be really difficult. You need to set clear boundaries with your supervisors and clients from the get-go. Thereâs a reason why call-outs and turnover rates are so high in that field, and itâs cause the job is physically and emotionally exhausting. Lots of respect and appreciation to you.
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u/panamanRed58 Mar 04 '26
Find a better employer, but until you do let them know when asked and unable to accommodate THEIR problem, you will not tolerate harassment. Let HR know your supervisor has deficiencies that need correcting.
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u/PennyButtercup Mar 04 '26
Iâd put in a time adjustment request to get paid for the time youâre wasting looking at your phone repeatedly. Otherwise, Iâd consult a lawyer regarding how to sue them for harassment.
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u/HoodRattusNorvegicus Mar 04 '26
NOR. To avoid getting bothered by my work or clients I got myself a dedicated private phone number and have one SIM and one eSIM on my phone.
On days off i just disable the work-SIM.
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u/Gobadorgosleep Mar 04 '26
If itâs your day off donât answer if you donât want to. Itâs up to you to decide if youâre willing to help on that day or not.
What I would do is put my phone in my room and not look at it if there is no need for it or put them specifically on mute. Itâs better to say « oh nooooo sorry I was busy and not able to take the phone » than to explain yourself.
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u/mirkwood_warrior Mar 04 '26
NOR. I work as my company's scheduler. I typically handle around 100 clients and 150 employees. I would NEVER guilt someone or act like this. A no is a no and they need to respect your time off. I personally feel if you respect the personal time of the employee, they are more likely and willing to show up for their actual scheduled shifts. Them texting and overwhelming you is not healthy for either one of you. I would straight up find a new job if I were you. One that has more respect for their employees.
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u/Severe_Wheel8656 Mar 04 '26
NOR Iâd be emailingâŠ: Good morning/afternoon/evening âsupervisorâ,
After review of my contract of employment, no where is it agreed upon that I will be forfeiting days off to work. With this being said, I will not be picking up any calls from scheduling on my days off. If you would like to review our terms of agreement Iâll be happy to do so at any point of convenience!
Thank you, have a great day,
OP
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u/Numerical-Wordsmith Mar 04 '26
Have you tried leaving your phone off or putting it on Do Not Disturb? Better yet, when I worked in a place that had a lot of heavy machinery, I used the phrase âI canât come in. Iâve already had an alcoholic drinkâ to dodge day-off calls.
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u/TheLinaBee Mar 04 '26
OP, normalize ignoring your phone. Stop answering calls from them when you're off unless you're looking to pick up work. If you're not, MUTE THE NUMBER. You are not obligated to notice when they call, and their bullshit behavior doesn't mean you have to change yours. If they want to guilt you, let them try. Be impervious to their attacks, you are NOR, but don't expect them to change unfortunately.
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u/chitheinsanechibi Mar 04 '26
This used to happen to me when I worked at a local fast-food place. I was on a fast-track to becoming a manager, and was always called on my days off whenever one of our less reliable employees either called in 'sick' or simply didn't show up.
They called me because back then I was a chronic people-pleaser and made the mistake of saying yes to doing it one too many times. Plus they knew that if they had me there, shit would get done.
It got to the point that I was the first person they'd call. I would tell them to call at least three other people before me, but they never did. I wound up just turning my phone off on my days off. And then I started getting shit about not being a 'team player'. Like, why am I getting shit? Why aren't you guilt-tripping the assholes who called out or didn't show? Oh right because you wanted someone who actually does their job.
I wound up having to quit because I developed stomach ulcers. Doctors told me it was due to stress.
Hold your boundaries. They have no right to emotionally manipulate you just because they can't keep themselves adequately staffed.
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u/Rasatuban Mar 04 '26
They are harassing you. Best you can do is to block the number on your off days. When they ask you about it tell them you are not on call and the outrageous number of their calls forced you to do that to ensure that you had actual rest between your shifts.
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u/Extension_Archer846 Mar 08 '26
NOR- I used to put up with jobs like this until I got a job where they actually respect my time, and now looking back I wish I never normalized this kind of stuff. There are better jobs and coworkers out there I promise.
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u/sifrthedestroyer Mar 09 '26
INFO- what is written into your contract / job description? When you say relief, are you on call? Or if you have a day off, is the expectation that you do not work that day? I don't know what the expectation is at your job, but I would never deal with that on my day off.
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u/Individual-Jump-5775 Mar 03 '26
This seems so unprofessional on their part plus what you said in the caption is extremely gross. Trying to get you to cancel appointments or guilt tripping you into taking over shifts is disrespectful