Quick update: life has been busy but I just wanted to say thank you to all the beautiful and informative responses. My son has been lurking the post and comments as well, and is so thankful for the communities.
I am excited to let you all know that he had his first dose of Testosterone on April 28th, 2026! I am so proud of him, and am honoured to accompany him as an ally on this incredibly powerful journey. Blessed be!
Hello, this is a throwaway for many many reasons, but I am a single parent with very little support or resources. I am trying to find local support groups but there aren't any options where I'm located.
I currently have a son (FTM) who is 14, about to start HRT therapy. It's just me and my two kids and we are settling into a fairly new-to-us community, and it's religious and conservative. A small prairie city in Canada where everyone seems to know everyone.
Right now, my child goes to counselling/trauma based therapy once a week, sees the pediatrician once a month, sees his HRT doctor once every couple months and so on.
He's active in soccer, the arts, and has a few close friends here. He intends on graduating here in the community due to us moving so often in the past, and I agree, we need some rooted stability in one place for awhile.
I am very supportive of my child. My father and grandmother are the only family nearby, and nearly the only family we talk to, and they are on the fence. (They would never say that to my child) We often spend holidays, celebrations and odd weekend dinners there. But, it's been mentioned to me how they're concerned about whether I should be encouraging this, and at such a young age. My father goes on about indoctrination, and blah blah blah. I understand his concern, but I don't agree with him.
My child is struggling with body dysmorphia, depression, ADHD, self harm and suicide ideation. Earlier last year my kids and myself were abandoned/estranged by their father and it's been a difficult journey, but things are starting to become more grounded and peaceful and secure. I'm currently in no contact, and in legal proceedings with their father and am keeping the transitioning and hormone therapy quiet in most public scenarios because he doesn't approve.
It's also good to note that he has willingly ghosted his children, they couldn't reach him anytime they have tried in the past. No one has kept the kids from seeing him, we actually encouraged him by allowing contact through my family for custody/visitation and that was ignored. The legal proceedings have been defaulted due to his lack of response after service, and we are currently waiting for the final draft to be signed by the judge.
I only want my child to be happy. We are extremely close, both of my kids are with me. I trust them, they trust me. We always had each other, and we continue to grow and heal. We've really overcome a lot together through these hardships, and there were some challenges, but my child entrusted this with me at their lowest point. I wasn't surprised Because I already had a feeling, and he was already identifying as bisexual and non binary at that time last year. He even felt comfortable with bringing his first girlfriend over after school.
I'm an ally to the community, and I don't see a problem with him starting hormone therapy if it's okay to do so which the doctor has approved and prescribed.
Of course, I'm scared that my child may regret this in the future. By signing off on this I could be making the wrong choice, and failing as a parent. That's really my biggest concern. What if changes his mind at some point?
I want to do the right thing and be my child's safest ally. We are currently booking a needle nurse for next week to teach us how to do injections. We are aware of the risks and irreversible effects.
I guess I'm experiencing last minute panic due to the severity of this decision, but all I really want is my child to live his best life regardless of what anyone else thinks. He has suffered enough, and has done a great deal of healing to persistently mend his trauma. I see him, I value him, and unconditionally love him. He's always been unique, and had trouble with being a female when young. Puberty has since made that agonizing for him. When he was 9, he asked to cut his long hair off, which I encouraged due to matting and avoiding brushing, and he came alive. Since then it's been baggy goth clothes, and a new name. He binds, and tapes as much as he can. Also, we are looking at suitable birth control options due to severe menses symptoms.
I've already made the resolve to walk away from any and everyone who isn't supportive, and will be setting the boundary once we decide we are ready to disclose.
I would really appreciate any advice from those who have transitioned as teens or parents who have children that transitioned at a young age. I am only trying to do my due diligence, and am open to all advice available.