AIO I Got fired over a disrespectful message

[u/BogusDuck]

For context, I’m the assistant manager (manager of the staff) and the front desk person at a Children’s Museum. Over the weekend, i discovered the fish tank unplugged at my work. The fish was dying and I tried everything i could to save him but had no luck (My boss didn’t let me leave to get anything that could help). I believe all animals should be respected as if they are a fellow human so I didn’t take this lightly and grieved for this fish. I texted my boss the next day giving my opinion about keeping fish here when no one has the training or knowledge (even if she does, she isn’t here all the time nor is willing to come in for such emergencies). She also leaves for trips so it’s helpful for someone else to have knowledge (like myself). I know i was a bit emotionally charged in my messages, but was this enough to be fired over? I’ve had no issues in the past and no serious writeups. I’ve done really well at my job and have consistently gone above and beyond what is asked of me, enough to be promoted to staff manager after 6 months of working there. I can see how what i said is disrespectful but in my opinion this could have been a write-up, not an immediate termination. Aio?

[u/unclethulk]

personal opinions that you see as objective facts

This line right here really struck a chord with me. I’ve been navigating some tricky territory in a family friendship with a person with autism. I want to be empathetic and compassionate, but I also need basic respect. The person in question is often abusive in the way they interact with me others. I write a lot of it off and give a lot of grace.

But when I do draw a line and take a stand, the conversation always gets around to the sort of lecturing that got OP canned. Without fail, I hear about the “highly developed sense of fairness”. And to be honest I think that trait gets badly misconstrued as some kind of superpower. It does not mean your judgement is superior concerning fairness. It does not mean that what you believe to be fair is objectively correct. It just means you feel very passionately about what you believe to be fair. You can still be wrong, and often are.

[u/TheSourCow → u/unclethulk]

This. As a diagnosed autistic person i am sick of this trait being referred to as “strong sense of justice” and then portrayed as a power or some sort of way in which autistic people are superior. 

I DO have a highly developed sense of fairness, in fact it is one of my strongest autistic traits, and all it has ever done is cause pain to both myself and OTHERS because of my inability to be flexible over the smallest inequalities. 

I dont agree with the OP bashing going on in this post but definitely hate the Aspie supremacy rhetoric that has proliferated online because of the whole “justice” thing. It makes allistic people hate us more than they already do.

[u/unclethulk → u/TheSourCow]

There are a lot of assumptions and disrespect being thrown around regarding OP here. For my part, I certainly hope you didn’t feel like I’m hating on OP or my friend or anyone else, on the spectrum or otherwise. I just really struggle with this one aspect of how my friend views and treats others. And I see some parallels with the attitudes on display in OP’s exchange. Intensity of belief does not equal validity of belief. That’s all I mean.

[u/TheSourCow → u/unclethulk]

Oh i agree with your comment and did not think you specifically were bashing anyone! Sorry if it came off that way. There has been a LOT of bashing from others in the thread and i wanted the end of my comment to clarify for anyone else reading that I am not a safe space for bashing autistics just because i leveraged a criticism against parts of the community lol. 

I have met many autistic people who struggle with the fairness thing but lack the self-awareness to realize that a need for fairness does not inherently equate to just and correct morals, which sounds like  perhaps your friend is one. That attitude is difficult to deal with for anyone, so you have my sympathies. 

 Tl;dr i wholeheartedly agreed with your comment and was just throwing in my two autistic cents lol